|
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 336
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 336 |
Cymanca, UPDATE PLEASE!
Sorry for the threadjack, I don't know how to start a new topic.
"In my instance, MB's two years of insanity was right on the money. At two years she came to me wanting to stop the divorce and try again. I said sure....under my terms.
"Plan B has worked to perfection for me.It preserved enough love at two years to consider reconciliation......but gave me the strength to walk away if my terms were not met."
Be excellent to each other and bless God.
Ronald.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 336
Member
|
Member
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 336 |
Cymanca, UPDATE PLEASE!
Sorry for the threadjack, I don't know how to start a new topic.
"In my instance, MB's two years of insanity was right on the money. At two years she came to me wanting to stop the divorce and try again. I said sure....under my terms.
"Plan B has worked to perfection for me.It preserved enough love at two years to consider reconciliation......but gave me the strength to walk away if my terms were not met."
-------------------- Be excellent to each other and bless God.
Ronald.
Be excellent to each other and bless God.
Ronald.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 591
Member
|
Member
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 591 |
"No power in the 'verse can stop me."
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224 |
Hi Rivertam - at the risk of threadjacking, OW called WH and left a drunk, pathetic message that leads me to believe that he told her things needed to cool off. Pauvre petit! At any rate (back to the thread) I find it interesting that two years seems to be a pattern for WH's rethinking their foolhardy behavior.
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724 |
I find it interesting that two years seems to be a pattern for WH's rethinking their foolhardy behavior. Two to three years seems to be the average in any relationship for the crazy, hormonal 'in-love' feelings to subside. You either then 1) split up when you realise that you don't really have that much in common after all; 2) begin to build a warm, affectionate and mature relationship built on deep love and mutual respect or 3) if you are in an affair relationship/marriage and you have given up your whole life for the OP, you either realise your terrible mistake and spend the rest of your life trying to make amends, whether or not you reconcile with your BS, or you stick with your OP, even though they are your doom and misery, just to prove to everyone else that your love was 'meant to be'. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> In the UK, you can get a divorce if you have been seperated for two years. I wonder if this has anything to do with the average life of affairs, that they tend to die around then, and many WS actually want to return to their BS after that time? Alph.
Me, BS 37
Him, WXH (Noddy) 40
DD13, DD6
Married 14th August 1993
D/Day 2nd April 05
Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28
Divorce final 6th July '06.
Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx
...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 750
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 750 |
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 76
Member
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 76 |
My WH's A has been going on for 2 1/2 years now, off and on. -- with no signs of their feelings dissipating (dday#1 was 1 1/2 years ago). It was secret and physical for the first year, NC for a couple of months, on again and secret for another couple of months, exposed and on for a couple of months, NC for a couple of months, secret and on again for a couple of months and now exposed for a couple of months again -- but on.
So, I'm wondering if being "thwarted" in their "love" makes A's last longer? If they didn't go a couple of months at times w/o any communication would it die faster? Or would it just heat up more? I still believe there hasn't been SF, though I believe that at the beginning it came pretty close. I sometimes wonder if I would have been better off letting it heat up and burn out -- but that thought is unbearable.
RT, a year IS a long time when there is no softening and no opportunity to work on things. I feel for you ((((RT)))) and pray that you'll have the strength and courage to do whatever it is the Lord would have you do. You are a rock.
Dulce
BS (me) 36
WH 38
Married 15+ yrs
DS 11
DDay #1 2-2-05
DDay #2 7-21-05 (15th anniversary)
DDay #3 4-10-06 (they're just "talking" now)
Currently in IC, trying to decide what to do next.
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 1,724 |
So, I'm wondering if being "thwarted" in their "love" makes A's last longer? If they didn't go a couple of months at times w/o any communication would it die faster? Or would it just heat up more? My STBX moved in with the OW the day after D/Day. He has been living with her now for nearly 15 months. I'm sure that the 'star-crossed lovers' stage has passed, as there is nothing to keep them apart any more. They are into the 'playing happy families' mode now. OW wants to have a baby, and is 'practicing' with my girls. Usually, when the infidels are together 24/7, the affair tends to die pretty quickly. Unfortunately, not in my case. Like I said before, I think this one is a lifer. There is no sign of tension in the relationship, not that I can tell much as I am not in contact with STBX. But they seem pretty stable. Alph.
Me, BS 37
Him, WXH (Noddy) 40
DD13, DD6
Married 14th August 1993
D/Day 2nd April 05
Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28
Divorce final 6th July '06.
Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx
...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
|
|
|
|
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,892
Member
|
Member
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,892 |
Rag,
What update are you looking for? After I found out that she would not agree to my requirement of signing a post nup agreement( which BTW is NOT enforceable in Ca. I just wanted to see if she would agree) and that she had lied yet again about several things including seeing other men, I went to a very dark Plan D.
We were to go to trial today, but yesterday morning I received an email from my attorney that the case has been postponed for the third time due to our judge's sudden vacation plans. New date 8-10-06
Divorced: "Never shelter anyone from the realities of their decisions": Noodle
You believe easily what you hope for ernestly
Infidelity does not kill marriages, the lying does
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 369
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 369 |
Ever since STBX moved out, I have no communication with him except with regards to our joint property and finances.
I do know he's rented a friend's spare apartment. I do not know if OW is living with him. I don't really care? Coz even if they don't live with each other, they WORK in the same office together. Lots of opportunities to get enough of each other.
I know he'll stay in the rel'ship because of his pride. After all he's destroyed, he knows that he has this thing he needs to prove to everyone.
~A
|
|
|
0 members (),
1,361
guests, and
92
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,624
Posts2,323,522
Members72,026
|
Most Online6,102 Jul 3rd, 2025
|
|
|
|