Okay. The Wookie OWNS this. He has manned up and taken charge of it all. It's his.

There is ONE issue he hasn't manned up to yet...YET...and that's apologizing to everyone in my family.

It finally got to him yesterday. I was in the kitchen cutting up veggies and he is at the dinette and he just out of the blue says, "I wish your family knew how much I love you." I looked up and he had tears in his eyes.

Did I sweep it under the rug? Nope. God had tempered him enough for this subject, I felt. I pointed at him with my knife and I said, "Maybe you should tell them." Then I got righteous on his brown, hairy butt and furthered it (all the while pointed my knife at him from across the room) by telling him, "YOU have manned up to every, single thing in this mess except one...YET. And I fully expect you to man up to that one last thing."

He's talking about looking into the PDs up there. He's already pulled the paperwork from Dallas and Denton.

He's talking about how he understands why they might not accept him, but he hopes they won't hold it against the children (they won't...for cryin' out loud...they raised ME! I didn't just fall out of a tree...I was brought up to know what kids need..)....

He can be such a yutz...but please pray for my yutz. This is scarier for him than asking my father for my hand, I think....but I also think he wants it just as bad.

- Kimmy

I love progress -
Prayers continue.

SS

Maybe you should tell them

How would he do that Kimmy ? A webcast ? Rent a hall with a lectern, and search the guests from rotten vegetables on the way in ? A grand tour maybe ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Bear in mind that:

* Your dad will always hate him because he hurt his baby girl. No matter how good he will be to you now or in future. I know this because *I* would feel the same way.

* Your mom and dad think you deluded that you took him back, so won't accept your exhortations of wookie.

What I would do if I were Wookie is go see your Dad 0 and him only,mano-y-mano

and say :

" I hurt your daughter real bad and I expect that you will hate me for ever. Just understand that I was crazy back then and I am straight now. I adore Kimmy and won't let the wind even blow on her ever again. But please, just hate ME not our new babies. Let them be a reminder of your daughters live and forgiveness, not my stupidity. I make Kimmy happy. These babies make Kimmy happy. You don't gotta like me but PLEASE support your daughter. I hurt her enough, don't you add to it"

Then our Dad will pass that message on IMO.

All blessings Kimmy.

I think..that you will have to take comfort in your own words..it's true..you didn't just fall out of a tree. A great many of your perceptions and processing skills are a direct result of your parents and family environment.[as a side note..I don't know WHAT the heck I fell out of ..but it's looking scarier every day..so as a result I have come to strongly distrust my own perceptions and givens]

Of course..your family is less invested in him than you are..and they haven't got to see and experience his remorse/change/growth in the same way that you have..so..time and consistency and lots of it..coupled with a workable functional plan..they need to SEE that this works and works well in order to back it..wouldn't you?

That being said..they probably WILL forgive him..but I wonder if the timing is right?

I wouldn't push if I were him..what sort of feedback are they giving YOU?

Anything that indicates that they are ready or that they would like to have the opportunity to formally forgive and embrace him and the children?

Noodle-bug,

TONS!

I know from talking to my mom and from a letter sent by her AND from my cousin checking in here after which she had an ah-ha moment when she read a post to me from Pep (waving at my cousin who is checking in, I know...and whomever else might be checking in on us)...I KNOW that this is a HUGE issue with them.

These people trusted him...they loved him too. He needs to apologize to them for breaking their trust...because no matter what a WS says about it only being between the wayward, OP and BS...IT'S ABOUT EVERYONE WHO LOVES THEM. It affects every person that cares about them, whether THE WS OR OP care that they care or not.

The Wookie is realizing how much he cares that they care.

It's a real eye opener for him.

Kinda like the eye opener he had when he realized just how much this affects the children. All along he was telling himself he was still being a good father when in actuality, he was STEALING from his children. Stealing moments, stealing their saftey, stealing their mother's sanity at times <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> ...

Now he's realizing how far the theft extends.

Quite a painful process, I think....but necessary.

- Kimmy

oh F***

change the title of this thread or I will kick your butt !!!

My Dad calls Mr Pep just to talk .....

Mr Pep apologized to my parents within weeks of D-day ....

they have a very close relationship that they, ON THEIR OWN, have developed and enjoyed.....

10 years in recovery is a fantastic perspective

Pep
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

(((( wookie-fuzz-butt ))))

How's this title????

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

I favor this.....

Time & pain & regret have taught me that when I betrayed Kimmy, I betrayed you as well. I will spend the remainder of my life making up for what I did by being the best husband to Kimmy, and the best father to all the kids ..... until I no longer draw breath from my body. I stand in humility before you, and ask your forgiveness. It may take time, I understand. I am willing to do whatever it takes for as long as it takes, to earn your forgiveness. I ask for your prayers for our family.

Yo kimmy - what kind of knife was it? One of those Crocodile Dundee jobs?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
WAT

Pep I LOVE it. I'm gonna give it to the Hairy Monster.

WAT - It is my most favorite steel knife besides my butcher knife...which, when I get out, children, animals and Wookies skeedadle out of the kitchen for some reason. But that knife I was usin' is about 12 inches long, 1 1/2 inches wide and sharp as your wit!

- Kimmy

Glad you added the NEARLY Kimmy, since I usually don't go for Sarge's movie reviews. Over the Hedge? Are you freakin' kiddin' me?

GC

kimmy

good for you and him, my fingers are crossed for him

kimmy

i don't know your situation history but it warmed my heart to read the obvious love you have for your H even though the information in your signature makes me think that you have had an awful experience.....a success story is just what i needed right now

thanks and good luck

you sound like your heart is one of a kind i wish you both the best

well ?????????

did he

get'er'done

?????????

My 'rents are visiting gma in Milwaukee right now.

I wish he could [censored] and git off the pot...

Of course, I've waited this long....

give him an encouraging shove

and offer

"the promise"

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Which promise would that be?

If it's what I'm thinkin', he gits that purdy regularly.

(snort)

Of course I could always promise he can golf or something he DOESN'T get regularly