:shrugs:

Probably best that I didn't see the post. So no harm, no foul.

smitchhelp, maybe now you can start the hard work of trying to get your marriage and your life back together. But it is the start, not the end.

Regards,
rs0522

{{smitch}} I pray you do not lose your baby. We are here if you need us.

RS,

I attacked your suggestion. I did not use profanity at you or any such thing.

The administrator and others felt I was out of line.
I tend to think that they are simply not willing to hear the cold harsh realities of what you are suggesting.

I disagreed with your suggestion, not necessarily with you as a person.

Smitch

I am sooo sorry to hear of your story. I am so sorry to hear that you might be miscarrying, trust me i know 1st hand the pain of losiing a child. But I will keep you in my prayers.

This might be easy to say but REMEBER God does not give you anything that you can not handle. ALSO EVERYTHING I MEAN EVERYTHING happens for a reason.

I hope everything works out for you.

smitchhelp, i am very sorry for what you are going through.

So Sorry You may b miscarrying, <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> hope and pray you don't.

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As previously suggested,,start your own thread if you choose to discuss this

Did that, too prove a point, you couldn't handle it,lol. also didn;t see it on this thread but later on another, might help to put it on this one,DUH


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angels1966,

As I stated, feel free to start the topic you choose.

Any problems, disputes, disagreements with the web site, the forums, moderation and/or Admin should be discussed with the appropriate persons via email.
JustUss
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(((Smitch)))

Please allow the "drama" to take a back seat at this time and rest. I think it was FCF who said that God won't give you more than you can handle...and he's given you people here to help you through ALL of this.

Prayers for you.

Eibrab

smitch,

Did you get in to the doctor today? How are you doing? I hope you are taking good care of yourself.

We do care........

Hi Smitch,

I was in the same boat last year. What Tigger described -- all those emotions, i went through all of them. I actually still do.

From the time I suspected I was pregnant and then later confirmed it last week of Aug, to the time I told my H about it in Sept and until I gave birth in March, I was under a lot of stress. I had to undergo emergency cs on my 8th month because my blood pressure shot up to 260/140. So do take care of yourself.

One thing I'd like to share with you is the importance of telling your H the truth. He deserves it. And whatever happens after will not be easy. Healing from betrayal and ruined dreams -- the hurt and the anger, is never easy. Add to that the guilt. And this isn't only for the betrayed party. It's for both.

I'm sorry if I seem to paint quite a bleak picture of what's in store for you but it's REAL. And being pregnant as you go through all these emotions can be a harrowing experience. You have to be prepared and keep your wits and emotions at bay, if at all possible.

Tell your H. End the A and any contact with the OM.

As much as your H deserves the truth, it shall also set you free. It is also an important part of remorse and repentance.

Take care, good luck and God bless!

PS: Tigger has helped me through my most vulnerable and weak times. Heed her advice.

Small thread jack here....Sophia, how are you doing? It is wonderful to hear from you. If you remember my email, please send me an update if you aren't comfortable doing so here.

Smitch,
How are you doing? Hope you are well. Please update those of us who are praying for you.

good lord! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Like I said, no problem. I realize that abortion is a topic on which many disagree.

Regards,
rs0522

Hi Smitch,

How are you doing?

Thinking of you...

~ad

smitch, please don't let the fact this thread got a little sidetracked keep you away. There are people here who have been in your shoes that can offer wonderful advice.

I hope you are okay. We are praying for you.

smitch, how are you? i am hoping you are in good health and things are somehow okay with you.

take care and God bless!

soph

Your husband treated you poorly when he knew it was his baby. How would he treat you if he knew it might be someone else's? Will he insist on an abortion? If you don't have an abortion how will he treat the baby, even if it turns out it is his? If you do have an abortion, how will you feel? Realistically, will his treatment of you be worse or better?

Actually, chances are the new pregnancy is his baby. There is some scientific theory on this, I don't have the cite for you right now but your husbands sperm will be more potent and stave off the OM's for some reason.

If it turned out that the baby belonged to the other guy, what would you do? Nine months from now, would you allow visitation etc. Would you stay married? My 2cents is you should think all these things through. Then you will know what to do.

If your husband is physically violent or threatening, this could put him over the edge. In that case, seek help from an expert on this topic before you do anything.

Em

Good advice- but it looks as tho she was having a miscarry the last time she posted here. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

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Marriage Builders========SUPPORT SITE

smitch,

I am sorry for your pain and I want to tell you God loves you, no matter what you have done. Christ died on the cross for you, you only have to accept his gift.

If you have not miscarried, PLEASE DO NOT ABORT YOUR CHILD! It will not make things better. I have had friends who thought that it would and are haunted until this very day.

You are very emotional right now. If you fear your h may harm you, I have to agree with TroubledH, try to make a backup plan to care for yourself if you should have to support yourself or flee for safety.

Your h needs to be told. When, I dont know, but the sooner the better, if it is SAFE. Do not risk your life or the life of your unborn child.

You must go nc with the OM, NOW! You need to seek professional help now!

I dont know about the most marriages end after the loss of a child statistic, I know people who have survived it and are closer now than ever before.

Only you know all the particulars in your situation, and you need to weigh them carefully, as to the when to tell your h about your adultery.

I advise that you are not alone with him when you do tell him.

And tell him you are truly sorry 1 million times if that is what it takes to reassure him. He lost a child also, it will be even harder for him to take that you have betrayed him.

I am a BS who learned of 2 alleged OC (ages 15 & 9) less than 2 years ago. I can tell you it is harder to forgive the years of deceit for me than it is to forgive the adultery.

And this child may very well be your h's and not the OMs.

God Bless You
Ann