Ok, I realize that I shouldn't even communicate with my WexH, but he recently sent a bunch of emails to my old email account and I read them. There are a few things in there that I want to respond to because he gets away with bullying and harming people since no one speaks up against it or stands up against it. He is bullying me this time, and I want to stand up for myself for once, and then enter into the land of forever "dark" where he cannot contact me ever again.

Here's the summary of stuff I need help with...

(1) he continually repeats lies and distorted/exaggerated stories about me, even after I've pointed out that they are false, he continues to say them over & over again

(2) he then uses these lies & stories to justify his cruel treatment, abuse & adultery

(3) if I say nothing, or reverse babble or anything, then he seems to take that as confirmation that the stories are accurate or I'm agreeing to his version, and the stories start to get worse and his anger rises

(4) if I object to these lies each time he brings them up, then he gets angry, says that I'm repeating myself (yes, I am, because he keeps repeating this lies) and then says he hates arguing with me (in reality, he hates it when I call him on this b*llsh*t and won't let him use his lies about me to ease his guilty conscience)

So, I feel like no matter how I respond, he uses it against me. These latest emails concern some things we talked about in the past, including some faults & mistakes I admitted, but now they are grossly distorted to the point of being outright lies. I'm terribly hurt, especially with regard to his comments about my family, and I hate this bullying. I want to make one last, firm, final reply and I don't know what to say. If he were a stranger or a friend's WexH, I would know what to do, but I'm too close to the situation.

Thanks

Why bother?
He won't listen anyway. He doesn't want to hear anything from you. He just wants to be right.

newly,

I think you are exactly right. I've decided to send him this reply:

The things you said about me and my family are not true. Stop lying. Do not contact me again.

(phew, that kinda feels good)

If you need to respond (for yourself) write the letter, read it, and burn it or file it away. If you have the words/response in you that need to get out - get it out. But understand that it is only for you - not for him.
Purge, cleanse and move on.

It's so much easier to give advice than to take it yourself <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I still have alot of cleansing to do myself.

Really the LAST one?

" . "

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

He is feeding (his frustrations and own unhappiness and - anger) from your replies...

His anger rises? No anger can rise forever...
And once you stop paying attention to his words and showing indifference - will stop him, eventually...
So, dear, starve him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> with no replying at all...