why is that I am not mad at my H for slaping me now put when i first got online I was ???<P>why is it I complain about Ow to complete strangers and after words i donot feel so bad<P>thank you all so much you all are great!

I'm sorry guys, but I really think we need to break out the granny smith's and the jello<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

I'm about ready to agree with you Deb.<P>One last try, though, just in case:<P>Carols22 - What are you asking for here? You know I've been taking you seriously, you know I've only offered my best advice so far, just like everyone else. But I guess we really need to know if you really WANT to do something about your situation.<P>Lori

Deb,<BR>Fraid I have to agree with you about the jello. Too many similarities in writing styles and statements. Just mentioned that in an e-mail to Kat2, yesterday. Glad to hear someone else has the same instinct.<P>

Checked ISP profile and it's style is quite sarcastic but same "case". I think "granny" will be attending a high school graduation after all next June.

Hey guys, <P>You all should be proud that you have such big hearts and were so willing to help this "person". I ignored "her" and mentioned my suspicions a couple of days ago. At least you guys could put aside that and still offer help, just in case it was legit. Give yourselves a great big pat on the back. I couldn't do it. I hate having to be so cynical at a place that usually offers so much comfort, but it looks like it's necessary now. What a shame! <P>------------------<BR>The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.<BR>Helen Keller<BR>

I do believe Carol.<P>Carol, I understand how you feel. You feel dependent on him, and I understand you just want the OW to go away and for your husband to not treat you badly. That is perfectly good things to want!<P>He has been given ALL THE POWER and CONTROL in this relationship, because he is the breadwinner, right? And because you see yourself as not being able to do it on your own? And because you see yourself as not having any support system because you don't have any family. And because you see yourself as a loser because you were a drug dropout.<P>If you think you can control your behavior, and keep your husband happy enough to keep from hitting you or sexually abusing you, then do that for now. <P>But in the mean time, start finding out how you could develop a support system. You really need to do this.<P>Also, if you call the crisis center in your area, you can begin to start some sort of counseling to help you through this. They will not demand that you leave your husband, but they can start you on a plan of action to change some of the things that are helping you see yourself helpless.<P>You are not helpless, just paralyzed with fear. <P>I am praying for you, because I do believe you are for real.<P>God Bless You,<BR>M4B

THANK YOU ALL WHO BELIEVE ME !!<BR>I have no reason to pour my heart in here sure i change my mind about H IS THAT WRONG<P>sure cannot type good is that wrong<BR>sure I have no brains is that wrong<BR>sure i put up with H other girl<P>again sorry to be so change hot and cold about H <P>I will leave you all and not post anymore <P>carols22@aol.com<BR>

Carol,<BR> Look, loving someone is not wrong. And being unsure of yourself or what you should do is not wrong.<P>However, allowing yourself to be abused, and forced into sexual situations that you don't wosh to engage in, well that may or may not be wrong, but it is dangerous. <P>I'm sorry if I am beginning to wonder if you are for real , however, we have all offered you advice, we have all praed, we have tried to be supportive to one degree or another, but we can't seem to reah you, whih is frusterating.<P> Think about it whis way, if someone told you they were in danger, and you tried to help them, but they refused to listen, wouldn't you wonder after a time whether or not they were for real ? <P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>