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I agree-LOL!
But I would temper that statement with this: It's all about degrees...
If "being tempted" means actually being attracted (drawn to) to someone who is not my husband, then I would say Nope-Not I.
But if "being tempted" means thinking a man is attractive, then I am guilty quite often.
My point is that I can see a man and see that he is attractive without being attracted TO him.
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CS - I think you should look in the mirror - you are being pretty petty too wouldn't you say? If you don't like Kiwi, just ignore her.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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What do you think would happen if someone gave the "wrong" answers to any of these questions? You speak the truth-LOL! And I ought to know-I have experienced the "wrath" firsthand...
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A very important point: Plus any guy who hits on a married woman AND KNOWS SHE'S MARRIED...is a creep in my book.
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I have no feelings for this person either way. He / she came into the thread to actually CONTINUE a cyberfight...
And-make no mistake-the fact that the rest of you are in here is creepy too; however, since I haev not yet experienced any direct hostility int he thread, I am continuing to discuss my topic as if nothing ever happened.
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And yet no one has jumped all over Pariah.
Curious.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Well CS, if you aren't hostile, I doubt anyone else will be.
Actually I hope eventually we find out why you are really here and can help you.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Well CS, if you aren't hostile, I doubt anyone else will be.
Actually I hope eventually we find out why you are really here and can help you. *****EDIT************* So, every thread I start or post in -I can count on your collective company?
Last edited by Justuss; 07/20/06 04:44 PM.
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WOW. Did I ever press your buttons!!!
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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LOL!
Can we be adults and get back on topic now?
I think a peek into the dynamics of how a person ends up cheating is interesting and personally useful.
I have only been married for a few years & I would like to gain a little insight on this...
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are you tempted to cheat?
Is that what all this is about?
Just wondering
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Nope... I see handsome men but nothing of any interest. I am already married after all...
I agree with another poster who said the leap from "looking" to cheating usually happens under the "right" circumstances. And it usually involves little compromises all along the way.
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Well CS, if you aren't hostile, I doubt anyone else will be.
Actually I hope eventually we find out why you are really here and can help you. Well...Jesus H. Christ You guys are worse than tha Jehova Witness Mormon Evangelicals. So, every thread I start or post in -I can count on your collective company? Well, gee whiz, CS!! If we didn't post to you, you'd be talking to yourself! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
"Your actions are so loud that I can't hear a word you're saying!"
BW M 44 yrs to still-foggy but now-faithful WH. What/how I post=my biz. Report any perceived violations to the Mods.
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Also, there are many tiny choices made along the slippery slope of adultery that lead up to the BIG choice. It is because of the tiny choices (movement of boundaries), that the big choice doesn't actually seem so big, which is why you hear many WSs say, "It just happened"...Until further examination in recovery, that is how it seems... MrsWonderings, this is SO true. Actually your words has reminded me of this excellent thread again – especially the following paragraph from that thread: ”How does adultery "happen?" People don't just decide one day to hop in bed and be unfaithful to their spouse. Adultery is the culminating act of a dozen or more tiny steps of unfaithfulness. Each step in itself does not seem that serious or much beyond the previous step. Satan draws a person into adultery one tiny step at a time. And he does this over time so that our conscience is gradually seared. This makes it easier to take "just one more step" thinking such a tiny step won't hurt us.”
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Cinnamon, this isn't "Plumeria 101".
People here are HURTING.
The pain one experiences regarding affairs is horrible.
It's not something you give an interview about, not when you're in the middle of it anyway.
Some have experienced this hurting in the past, got over it, and stick around to help others get through it.
You, or any other poster for that matter, will stick out like a sore thumb when you're just asking "general" questions out of interest, looking for info-tainement.
Would you ever consider doing this at an AA-meeting?
Saying "Hey, I'm not an alcoholic, I'm not here to help you either, I'm just browsing to know what alcoholics are like and how their partners experience that ?"
There is plenty of information about here on the MB site, there are plenty of good books that cover the subject of infidelity and will satisfy your curiosity.
Please remember that you are not dealing with some subject here like how to grow a plumeria. And even then, no-one would appreciate you NOT speaking out of your own experience, but rather from hear-say (unless you have excellent sources!).
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Quote from Cinnamon:
_________
Nope... I see handsome men but nothing of any interest. I am already married after all...
I agree with another poster who said the leap from "looking" to cheating usually happens under the "right" circumstances. And it usually involves little compromises all along the way.
_______________
So at what part are you? You have the right circunstances and taken the little compromises? Are you having fun?
Are you here looking for justifications to start an affair?
d-Day- jan2006
Me 38, WH, 36
Children-8 and 10
status: slow, slow, recovery...
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I have a thought - maybe she is justifying in her mind how she became the other woman in someone else's marriage.
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Quote from Cinnamon:
_________
Nope... I see handsome men but nothing of any interest. I am already married after all...
________
I read:
I have been looking around, there's plenty to choose from....but, uau.. it's so exciting, I am married and all... it's such a different strong emotion...
Quote from Cinnamon:
_________
I agree with another poster who said the leap from "looking" to cheating usually happens under the "right" circumstances. And it usually involves little compromises all along the way.
_______________
I read:
It's really exciting, actually there's this guy... and yes there was some atraction, and.. we kind of connect... and well I kind of already engage in the attraction game, but means nothing... just some flirting.... After all... it just happened... and well... there's so much people cheating... is this really something special I can't loose the chance? Is it that easy to feel like this from someone else? Let me ask how those WS in MB felt... Maybe it's not that wrong... feels good... H wont even know... well if by any chance he will find... I have MB...
That's what I read... but I am hopefully completely wrong.
d-Day- jan2006
Me 38, WH, 36
Children-8 and 10
status: slow, slow, recovery...
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MoFo, you suggested that CS might have been an OW in her marriage. I don't know if it was you who said that before, but it is patently ridiculous.
CinnamonSugar assured us she did not take her husband from between someone else's legs, and we need to just accept her word on that. I'm sure she has been perfectly frank with us during her time here.
A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb Neak's Story
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Jen, Dru - fair enough. Being a guy, I can't put myself in a woman's shoes - well, I could, but that's another discussion! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> I can't imagine a guy who hasn't looked at an attractive or otherwise sexy woman and hasn't thought hmmmmmmm........ I think it's human (guy) nature. This does not include taking the first step to planning an infidelity. Just the basic temptation starting point. WAT See, that's soo before the starting point for me, it doesnt even count. That might be temptation (for some) to think dirty thoughts, or to mast., or to rape, but to 'cheat' you need to approach or be approached by willing partner. No offense, but I doubt every cute woman you see is just waiting to jump into bed with you, Shrek <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />. I've seen a million attractive men... cool. I'm not so hyped or desperate (or ?) that each one makes me think of SF. My H makes me think of SF. Cute/sweet men are more like flowers... nice. Really hot guys make me think 'spoiled rotten boy-slut'. NOT very tempting. It's probably different for women as men are, well, sluttier. We know we can pretty much get what we want, maybe that takes the thrill out of it? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> (ducking for cover) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> - Dru
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