Well, WW really never did snap out of it. She's been gone again for 3 months with me in a decent plan b.
I've heard and she admitted to seeing OM again after a good 8 month NC.
She was out with him at a small town bar were everyone knows what had been going on....anthow Friday at 9 am is the hearing....I just want to fast forwsrd to 10 am and put this nightmare at rest.
Please pray that I can hold my boundaries and be strong at the hearing.
Thanks folks....some never figure it out....she's one.

WB,

U have my support from way out here in the middle of the big blue.

take care,
L.

Thanks, she phoned yesterday to set a time to pick up a few things from our home. She asked if I wanted to call it off?
Saying we could cont. to live apart.....and she would like to see me....but be single. She did'nt ask if we could still repair it....she just don't yet know what she wants and it's close to 3 years now.
She didn't show up to get the things last night.....I guess the "No" was'nt what she was looking for. She did'nt call or nothing....just a no show.

Stay strong Welderboy. You never know what the future holds but you can't keep going the way you have been. Show her your strength right now even if you don't feel it.

WB,

U realize if you say left, she goes right and if you say up, she goes down. It's not what you say or do, it is just because you say or do, makes her want the opposite. See the need for reverse babble?

I told my then Ws that we wanted him t/b happy, even if it was at our expense. By the time I said it I was very frustrated. I couldn't speak reasonably to him since it just didn't even make it in his ears. The glazed look in his eyes told me his mind wasn't processing our convos.

So I told him his happiness was important even if it was at our expense. That sent him into a tailspin. It was like I found the button for moment and he looked might confused. The signal to the mothership short circuited for a while. I thought I was in a sci-fi flick. LOL!!! Of course I was crying at the time and it had a dramatic effect. I should have won an oscar for that performance. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Just expect her to NOT want what you say.

L.

I don't really know what to say anymore....other than "I want this over!!!". I did'nt hear from her today, and I figure she don't like losing control... I only hope she is in court friday and we settle. Thanks.

good for you...you've endured enough of this madness. she is keeping your life in a 100 percent uproar.

time for peace now.

too bad she doesn't know what she wantS...FOGHORN HERE...SHE IS NOT SINGLE. SHE IS MARRIED. what she is saying (alien translation is one of my specialites) is "Welderboy, we can still be married, so that YOU can pay for MY adultery and we can live apart, date once and a while b/c I feel happy and comfortable with you, but be single so I can go and #uck around"

that's what the alien is spewing my dear.

do NOT BELIEVE THE ALIENS! aliens speak with forked tongue!

leave her stuff in a baggie on the front step. leave it there until either the elements or the alien comes to get them.

how dare she try to suggest what she have YOU do after such vile behavior.

Peachy said it and I'll reiterate:

PEACE to you.

You will be in our thoughts and prayers come friday morning. Your appointment is duly scheduled on my desk calendar.

Mr. Wondering

Thanks....and please don't wait til friday morning to pray, please start now!! I'm so now....at peace with this decision that I want it over....looking back love is so blind.

Welderboy,

You can be at peace with yourself and confident in your decision to end the M. The path to that decision had to be painfull, but we all have our breaking point.

The fact you're getting a D is sad. The fact you've done everything in your power to hold your marriage together, only to be constantly refuted by the fogged-out WS is admirable. Hold your head high. You are taking action and managing within your boundaries. My prayers go out to you.

Thanks Hardlesson, it's been a very rough 2 1/2 years.
As I look bad ...I now see that the huge price of all this has made be a better man. I listen to folks better, hold my tonque more and appreciate those couples around me that have made it in their marriages.

It's truly a shame that my wife never at the time of being hit on...by a repeat predator...OM, did'nt see how much love I had for her.

People around me and my family are impressed that after all this I'm not bitter, I truly hope that WW finds her way....she once was and can be a very beautiful and loving lady. I feel for her and only wish her happiness and peace within....

And YOU Welderboy...

Are becoming a Welderman. I say that with all sincerity. You have grown enourmously through all of this and your next relationship and marriage will be something very special I think.

God Bless,

JL

I just got done....thinking of the few blessings that can and have already came out of this which is something truly ugly.
I guess thats why we need to have faith in time of bad as well as good. And yes...I'm no women hater, and know that I'll make someone a great husband....if I also find someone that loves as I do. Thanks and God Bless you all.

Reading this almost brought tears to my eyes...I can't tell you how moving this post is of yours.

What grace you have Welder, pure grace...
and what a future you have, even though I know it is not what you would have chosen three years ago or on the day you married.

The words of your post are so impressive. So glad I logged on this morning.

Welder, you shine.

Weaver...thank you.
Your words about me...made me break down and cry.
During her talk the other day...after asking if we could call it off....and just live seperate, she admitted that it was her total selfs unhappiness that let this happen.
Her job, health and family moving along with her new friends and thoughts that I didn't love her this much let her go out "looking" for some happy high to her life.
Guess thats why I see happiness in small things.
I only hope that she is a the court house Fri. morning....we have a no contest agreement and don't need this pulled out longer. Again, thanks for the kind words....I would never wish this on anyone!

WB,

Live to ride, ride to live.

I am cranking up my Deuce just for you.

Welder- Dude I feel for you. Divorced here back in Feb. Now I get an e-mail the other day from ExWW asking about our DD etc. and get the "she screwed up , changed many peoples lives and all for her selfishness etc...oh well. Everyone tried to tell her not to hitch her wagon to OM, as he is a loser in many facets.
Hold your head high and be strong, yes you will or are a changed man by going through all this, but a better man in reality....

This does sound like a prime chance for reverse babble:

WW: "Are you sure you don't want to call off the divorce? We could live apart and still be single?"

Welder: "So you're asking me if I want to call off the divorce so that we can stay married but we can live apart and you can still act like you're single?"

The thought processes of the WS are truly impressive to behold...like watching a car wreck in slow motion...it's horrible and you know what's coming, but you can't pull your eyes away from the gruesome beauty of it.

Been nervous all day....hope that all goes smooth in the morning.

Any tips for a good nights rest?

Jaegermeister!!!

So the burning question IS, what was your last meal as a married man?

Whatever it was, finish off the evening with a Jaeger & McDonald's Vanilla Shake at 11:30 pm and you'll sleep like a champ.

Blessings...feel Gods love and protection tomorrow. He will be right there along side you.

Mr. Wondering