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I'm not sure- I like many here are attempting to understand
and find my way- obviously not in the most traditional
sense.
In attempting to do so- and opening myself up- I hope in
some way to be of benefit to others- I certainly hope to do
no harm. More than that I can't say.
Again I ask, my posting triggered something in you to
respond- may I ask, what it was?
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Thank you for making it clear why you are here.
However could you kindly think about what message your presence here will send to the struggling BS whose greatest fear is that their WS will marry the OP, and the WS who are being counselled against their emotions that their affair is wrong and will not lead to anything ?
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Bob,
I think that for certain BS, I will anger and upset them-
for others I can maybe (big maybe) answer some questions
or provide insight- although understandinf my own
actions is what drew me here in the first place.
And for the record- My H (MM at the time) was counseled
against his emotions and told that I was not special that
I could be anyone- yet we're married, happy and together.
Please understand I do not say this in any salt in the
wound kind of way- but with certain understandings and
visions that only time brings.
Again- my hope is not to cause harm- only learn and
maybe help. Only time will tell on that one- I guess.
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PP,
Your very presence here is causing great harm. But I'm guessing you don't care.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Do you think the BS who are so very very upset by your presence on are unreasonable in their disaffection for a flaunting of their worst fear realised ,as your situation would appear to be ?
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Could you please further explain your comment- especially
as to the Why?
I'd really like to know why YOU specifically feel this
way?
As I'm sure you already know- you can put me on "ignore"
so that if my presense offends you- you can pretend I and
anyone like me doesn't exist.
But does that really help you or anyone else?
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TNPP wrote:
And for the record- My H (MM at the time) was counseled
against his emotions and told that I was not special that
I could be anyone- yet we're married, happy and together. So happily married that you find it necessary to post on an "Infidelity" board posing as someone that wants to help/support with __________________?
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[color:"blue"] * [/color] 17 percent of divorces in the United States are caused by infidelity. (lower than I thought!) The following is from Dr. Frank Pittman: "In 30 odd years of practice, I have encountered only a handful of established first marriages that ended in divorce without someone being unfaithful, often with the infidelity kept secret throughout the divorce process and even for years afterwards. Infidelity is the sine qua non of divorce."
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Bob,
I think if you have read my prior posts, have you?
It would prove that I am attempting not to flaunt anything
only state the reality of my truth.
Surely, it will upset some BS to know that on the odd, rare
occasion that OP do end up with WS but the reality exists
that on some occasions (as wrong as it is) that does happen.
Can I not be welcomed here the same way many WS have been?
Knowing that I am repentant and am working my way through
all this much as a WS has?
Why am I different?
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Please refer back to my prior posts.
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I'd really like to know why YOU specifically feel this
way?
TNPP
DO you not see how you represent the absolite nadir of every hopeful BS and recovering FWS on these sites ? A 'successful' affair, that is claimed to be legitimate afterwards ?
Your presence here is like a smug fox in a henhouse IMO. The feathers are still stuck to your snout.
I am desperately offended by your presence here for my own part, and even though I might put you on ignore the fact that your example was out there polluting the hopes and fears of the most vulnerable people on these boards would stay with me like grit in an oyster. How can I advise fearful new posters that affairs are bad when you claim legitimacy for your own via marriage Paige ?
Can you not see what you represent here ?
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Pink, if your relationship began as a betrayal, are you not concerned about a betrayal happening some day (sooner or later) within your relationship?
The stats say that relationships that begin this way almost certainly will suffer the same fate...
signed,
Another MB Pariah
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Can't you see that denying any plausibility that it does
happen deludes those here.
Once again you view my presense here as some sort of
Ha-ha event- have you read my prior posts- Yes or No?
Please keep me from having to ask over and over again
have you read it or not?
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Can I not be welcomed here the same way many WS have been?
Knowing that I am repentant and am working my way through
all this much as a WS has?
Why am I different?
You destroyed two marriges to get what you wanted Paige. what part of that is repentant ?
You stole the money. You're REAL sorry now you're living high on the hog but you won't give the stolen money back.
FWS repair the damage to the marriage they damaged paige.
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Paige,
You would be far happier over on TOW board. They love affair marriages over there. They will give you all the legitimacy and validation you are craving for. At least until your H has another affair of course. (or you do)
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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No, I don't.
I know that many BS take some sort of solace in the he'll
do it with you- he'll do it to you believe. From where
we stand, and I know it's not the typical place...no.
We both worked very hard with our parish counserlors and
reconciling with family to get to where we are now.
Do I trust him absolutely- no, but that has more to do with
my personality than the fact that we began as an affair.
I'm curious for those who question my presense here- if my
motivation is anything less than a desire to do no harm- why would I be here? Certain old timers like Pep and Weaver
know me- and my true motivation- but I'm always subject to hostility and no benefit of the doubt from those who don't.
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Bob,
I was not married before this.
This tells me- you haven't read my prior posts, please
read them before conversing with me further.
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Obviously you are someone else that has not read my
prior posts before feeing justified in assigning
judgement.
I was a former TOW poster- see Pep's post regarding me
and subsequent kind apology.
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************edit*****
Last edited by Justuss; 08/07/06 10:42 AM.
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