My wife of 2 years who has been my best friend of almost 10 years has recently decided that we need to have a "trial seperation". She would not discuss terms of the seperation and could not offer any promises in regards to the OM. She met this guy online, he is/was a close friend of mine-- Scumbagus-maximus.
She has now been gone less than a week and has called twice to "say how sorry she is for everything" and to "see how i'm doing". She also mentioned that sometimes "she feels like she just wants to come home but that she knows what she needs to do". <--whatever that means.
I made it clear that for us to have a future she needed to break off all contact with this guy. She nodded. I set some boundaries before she left by telling her that i was sympathetic of her predicament but would not compete for her love. (Oddly, now with plan A i'm doing just that).
I think the fog is coming and going a little. She has always been an upright, moral person and the guilt is likely eating her alive. That affair is doomed i'm sure.
She said she "had no plans" to see him upon her move. This is an obvious lie- although she may have meant it, he will likely be the pursuer anyways.
On the phone she tells me all about the relationship improvement books she is reading and asks what i am reading. She expresses her love for me and seems to still care deeply but it may only be because she is getting a quick fix for her emotional needs.
I've moved into a new place, got a new job, made new friends and would like to gain some further clarity on this thing. She seems so equivocal at times that i wonder if divorce papers mailed to her might knock her off the fence.
Plan A seems ok so far but i often wonder if i am just enabling her to continue a disgusting affair. I'm considering changing my phone number and sliding into plan B. Maybe shooting off an email first to clarify whether or not we are seeing other people. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Any advice?
