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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 7
P
Junior Member
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 7
All please advise,

I had an 11 month wild affair with a friend of mine who is married.We both knew each others spouses and 5 months back her husband found out about our affair.We haven't met after that and have spoken over the phone just 4 times .
She seems to be more stronger and is trying to hold her marriage together where as i am not able to get over her.

Ofcourse i did something wrong and deserve this but still i just not able to forget her.

What should I do.We both love our spouses but I am just not able to forget our time together...our talks,emails,SEX...WILD sex.....

Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921
You should probably post this in General Questions II as you will get more replies.

Does you wife know? If not, you need to be prepared to come clean. Before you do, read all you can at this site and make a plan. Your poor wife is going to be DEVASTATED!!! You have hurt her more than you could ever imagine. She is probably going to scream at you, cry, kick you out, maybe beg for you to come back.... You are going to have to be patient with her because she is going to go through wild mood swings because of what you have done. And it will take time for her to heal from this.

First order of business... No contact period with your girlfriend. Send her an email and put a stop the affair immediately and never contact her again. Your love for her (sorry, but is infatuation) will go away over time.

It is time to work on your marraige and forget about the "wild sex"...

Sorry if I seem harsh... Most of us here have been cheated on. But, we will help you.

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
I second the recommendations to post on Gen Ques II. But, be prepared!

You will be told to immediately send the OW a no contact message. And you will be expected to do so. And to follow up on that by having NO CONTACT EVER with OW.

Then you will be told to come clean to your wife. And that won't be pretty at all. It will hurt both of you like no one's business.

The alternative will be even more devastating.

Withdrawal from the OW will be painful. Your wife's reaction will be painful to both of you. But, these are the logical consequences of your choices.

Remember, you had a choice.

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
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Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
BTW, your marriage may yet be saved if you work the MB plan.


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