...4...

LOL good outlook Walt!
I am anxious for your peace to come!
You're doing VERY well.

If you have a moment, stop by MinnesotaMikes thread.
He is in a situation very similar to yours.
The journey you've taken would inspire him!

I'll take a peak. Hopefully, my journey can be one example of a POSSIBLE outcome. Every situation is different, but knowing that there's not only one "good" outcome provide the necessary hope that feeds the required stamina to get through it.

This day is better than any other day in my life... EVER. Tomorrow will be even better.

Tensions running pretty high at Walt's house. Tomorrow is a very important milestone in my life, and my family's life.

The STBX trying to jam visitation, etc. down the daughter's throat. All I can do right now is watch and wait.

Best of luck Walt we are praying for you. update us!

Walt:

How did it go???




I can only imagine....

LG

bump

Well... another huge leap. The move was a bit tense. The STBX and my daughter got into several arguments. It was embarrassing. My STBXs brother helped us. He told me when we were alone that he felt like an accomplice to the whole thing by helping move. I said that he's one of the only people I trusted and that he's helping me... not just her. He said that he's ok with it then. He's a great guy. We talked about getting together in the near future to keep the kids together.

The STBX had the kids over last night. I was worried, but kept busy and distracted myself. I talked to the kids and the STBX and they had a very good night. I know that my ex doesn't have much in the way of stamina with relationships, so it'll be one visit at a time. Maybe she'll be a little "better" as a mother from a distance. Who knows.

Saturday night I had some serious decompression. I actually got nauseous and my legs ached, but I slept well. Very well. Like I've never slept before. Like new-born babies sleep. Deep, peaceful, no dreams, no movement, like drifting on a raft off of a deserted island. No worry, no pain, as close to perfect as I'll ever feel on this earth.

I'm almost home.

Walt, I didn't read much of the thread... but I clicked on your plan A results.

Well done. I am very impressed and just amazed. (and I'm a guy!)

At least you know it's not looks, you look GREAT. I think your W's BIGGEST mistake will be leaving you alone for more than a month or two.

Thanks.

The STBXW signed the settlement agreement today.

CHECK! There goes another big checkmark.

Started painting inside the house. Totally different look, colors, wall hangings, etc.

The transformation continues...

Walt,

You walk away from this disaster with your dignity intact and I salute you for that.

You can look back with pride at how you handled things. Your ex will be very sorry some day.

I've implemented my own "get back in shape" plan now that I'm back on my feet.

Good luck in all you do.

Walt:

You got to give us more than that!

How is the rest of it going?

Where is the weight goal now?


Jus' wonderin'

LG

I've successfully maintained my weight loss. Didn't reach my ultimate goal (yet), but feel great about myself in general.

Fishing season just started. Haven't gotten out yet, but I'm going to wet a line tomorrow.

The visitation seems to be going well. There have been some "instances" that have caused my ears to perk up, but overall, not bad. She's following through with her end of the financial deal so far.

Funny how the longer she's out of the house, the more removed I become from her emotionally and mentally. I realize that IN MY CASE, this was what I prayed for so many sleepless nights... the best possible solution to the problem.

I realize that the idea of a "perfect family" would never have happened no matter how hard I tried.

I got new deck furniture yesterday and assembled it last night. It looks great and provides a nice change of atmosphere. The painting is going GREAT! I feel great looking at my "new home". The closing on the house should be within a couple weeks.

I'm still adjusting to things in general, but moving forward making decisions as I go. Sometimes, you just can't plan out everything in your life... I'm learning that.

Thanks again for reading...

Settlement agreement is signed by both of us.

Next... closing on the house into my name. She will be receiving the documents to sign tomorrow.

Almost there...

Just popping in to say hello and thank you. Its almost over. We're waiting for a court date and all that's left is transferring some retirement money.

I've done SO much at MY house to make it my own. The kids are generally adjusting and I'm consistently there for them.

Work has been great. The kids and I went to Ocean City, MD for a vacation and hit a Kenny Chesney concert last week as my birthday gifts to them.

I'm enjoying being the father, friend and PERSON that I want to be. I find that I'm looking forward to life again and the things I've always enjoyed. I've been able to be there for my family more often, and haver reconnected with some old friends, and enjoyed meeting new ones.

Did a little dating, but really feel compelled to hold off for a while to give the kids the stability they need.

I could go on about some behavior exhibited by the X, but it would only exhaust me at this point. She is who she is and I'm no longer in charge of protecting her from herself.

Hope all's well with the great folks here... Thanks again.

Walt

Good for you! Nothing beats making a good life for yourself and your family. That gives you a chance at happiness no matter what. And our MB men always do very well in dating.

Walt,

It's cool to see someone who has a similar attitude on dating. I'm a little further along and more open to it, but stability for the kids is a huge thing I wrestle with myself. I'm sure you'll do great once you start again, especially with all you've learned on MB.

I understand what you say about the ex. I wish I had your self discipline, however, because I gripe and moan about things she does all the time. I didn't get 50/50 custody, though, which has been my biggest sticking point.

Good luck and thanks for dropping in.

The only thing I ever get a little down about is not really being able to have that complete family. I know, I know... its better now than the alternative, but I really love being a dad, and a husband for that matter!

But that's life. You deal with it and move on and be the best person you can be.

As far as the divorce goes? I got everything I really wanted... my kids. Plus no alimony payments, I COLLECT child support to help raise my children, I bought the house and its now in MY name. Still a little weird to think of it as just MY house, but it'll always be my and my children's home.

She tried to do the 50/50 thing and I wouldn't have it myself. Now I'm so glad I did it that way. She has started sleeping over her new boyfriend's house with the kids all the time. My son just mentioned to me that he wishes that he could do some more stuff with "just mom", so I told him to talk to mom about it. I stay out of it... it was the best change I've made to date, but still hurts to see my son still wondering and putting the pieces together in his mind, etc. And watching the ex just continue with her life of ignorance and denial.

Yeah, it'll never feel "normal" I guess.

September 4, 2007 at 9:00 AM this chapter of my life will be over.

I've never felt better about the future.