Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
Anyone have suggestions on how to counteract the "betrayed spouse's diet", without killing cholestorol levels?

Part of me thinks I need to go to the gym. The other part thinks that if I do, I'll burn off the calories I intake, and then start burning my remaining muscle away.


ME: H, 35, married 9 years. 3 young sons W:32, series of online "friendships" 1st D-day: some time 2004 (online EA) OM broke off, NC june 2005, but no recovery plan 2nd D-day: june 20th, 2006("ILY" to "friend"). W moved out next day. Oct 2006, starts being around a 3rd guy instead. Mar 2007, stopped? Current status: Separated. W filed D. in July 2006, served Dec 11th, my response filed Jan 8th Most recent thread
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 5,575
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Jan 2002
Posts: 5,575
for most of us our metabolism is in over-drive because of the adrenaline. try over feeding your metabolism with high protein rich foods.


what we do in life......echoes in eternity!
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
Ah, what others have called the "Infidelity Diet."

It worked for me!

I went from 145 to 120 in a few weeks. All the old jeans I saved from college would fit again. Found $5 in a pocket. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

The real fix is anti-depressant meds, IMHO.

Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
Healthy fats are mood stabilizing. So have some..two birds/one stone.

I would suggest a brisk walk rather than a gym workout...enough to get the endorphines flowing but not so much as to send your already shocked system into overdrive.

Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
whassa "healthy fat"?


ME: H, 35, married 9 years. 3 young sons W:32, series of online "friendships" 1st D-day: some time 2004 (online EA) OM broke off, NC june 2005, but no recovery plan 2nd D-day: june 20th, 2006("ILY" to "friend"). W moved out next day. Oct 2006, starts being around a 3rd guy instead. Mar 2007, stopped? Current status: Separated. W filed D. in July 2006, served Dec 11th, my response filed Jan 8th Most recent thread
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
W
Member
Member
W Offline
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
Quote
whassa "healthy fat"?

Sounds like beer. "mood stabilizing"

WAT

Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693
F
Member
Member
F Offline
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693
Try eating meal substitution bars like Myoplex bars.

I don't know if you have them but Jamba juice is great too.

Yes the infidelity diet. I went on a diet to lose weight and spent 6 months sacraficing to lose 50 lbs.

Right when I was done my fww has the A. Ended up losing another 15 lbs. Boy was I ticked off. Why couldn't she have had the A earlier so I didn't have to have any will power. Boy was that selfish.


BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby


When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
yeah, got jamba juice. Love it, but thought it was mostly "low fat" type stuff that helps you LOSE weight, or only maintain it.
Similarly, the "meal substitution" stuff, is usually geared to lose weight.

Maybe I need to start eating "power bars" or "cliff bars", i guess. the really obnxious 2,000 calorie things for climbers.
Trouble is, I think they are the usual dry hard to swallow things. sigh. hate those.
Anyone know of a good "mixer" with them? (non-alcohol though) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


ME: H, 35, married 9 years. 3 young sons W:32, series of online "friendships" 1st D-day: some time 2004 (online EA) OM broke off, NC june 2005, but no recovery plan 2nd D-day: june 20th, 2006("ILY" to "friend"). W moved out next day. Oct 2006, starts being around a 3rd guy instead. Mar 2007, stopped? Current status: Separated. W filed D. in July 2006, served Dec 11th, my response filed Jan 8th Most recent thread
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
Actually...any fat is a mood stabilizer...but since you were concerned with health aspects...why not go with healthy fat?

There are long lists of different sources..just google.

Myself I lived on tuna salad on crackers and cheesecake.

And coffee.

Retrospectively the coffee might not have been my best decision...but let's keep that under wraps (((((coffee)))))

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,424
D
Member
Member
D Offline
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,424
Lots of chocolate. Preferably dark.


Me - BS DDay 1 (Multiple affairs while overseas) - Feb 2003 DDay 2 (AdultFriendFinder Profile) - April 2007 Seeing a counselor. I think we have him stumped.
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
Ummm.. are you claiming that cheesecake is healthy??

Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
Yes

Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
:0 ...:) ...:P

Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,424
D
Member
Member
D Offline
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,424
Cheesecake IS healthy. I think it falls under Dairy on the food pyramid. If you put cherries, blueberries or strawberries on it, you can add Fruit. I'm debating whether the graham cracker crust counts as a Grain.


Me - BS DDay 1 (Multiple affairs while overseas) - Feb 2003 DDay 2 (AdultFriendFinder Profile) - April 2007 Seeing a counselor. I think we have him stumped.
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 833
S
Member
Member
S Offline
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 833
The best thing to do is to try to maintain as normal an eating routine as possible. Try to squeeze in those 5 fruits/veggies every day and limit processed foods. Eat lean protein sources and lowfat dairy, and definitely go on brisk walks. A 30-minute walk can do a lot... clear your head, get you out of the house, and help stabilize. Healthy fats include things like avocado, olive oil, nuts. Go for whole grains whenever possible... they even make whole wheat pasta and tortillas now. BTW, bread has to say 100% whole wheat on the label, or it's not whole wheat!

With all that being said, I work in public health, and I see nothing wrong with treating yourself a little every day. Don't go overboard, but it's OK to have a little comfort food. Mine was chocolate, but I still ended up losing over 15 pounds. Here it is a year later, and I'm just now starting to gain back a little bit.


(Formerly SadMommy05) BS, 29 (me) XH, 27 DD, 1 M, 2001 high school sweethearts OW, 36, divorcee, "we have a friendship people can't understand" WH left out of the blue 9/5/2005 I filed 11/1/2005 D finalized 6/20/06 XH and OW married 1/6/07. Ugh!
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
T
Member
Member
T Offline
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 936
a 30 minute walk... helps me put on weight again?
I'd like to understand how that works <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


ME: H, 35, married 9 years. 3 young sons W:32, series of online "friendships" 1st D-day: some time 2004 (online EA) OM broke off, NC june 2005, but no recovery plan 2nd D-day: june 20th, 2006("ILY" to "friend"). W moved out next day. Oct 2006, starts being around a 3rd guy instead. Mar 2007, stopped? Current status: Separated. W filed D. in July 2006, served Dec 11th, my response filed Jan 8th Most recent thread
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Member
M Offline
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Quote
Cheesecake IS healthy. I think it falls under Dairy on the food pyramid. If you put cherries, blueberries or strawberries on it, you can add Fruit. I'm debating whether the graham cracker crust counts as a Grain.

Lose the graham cracker crust and lose the sugar. I make my own homemade cheesecake with no crust and no sugar. It is made with Splenda and is out of this world. Course if you want to fatten up, you should not exercise and should eat lots of corn and grains, that is how they fatten up cows and hawgs. Will wreck your cholesterol, but you can lose weight! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101



Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 526 guests, and 116 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
finnbentley, implementsheep, rafaelakutch, DGTian120, MigelGrossy
72,044 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Three Times A Charm
by still seeking - 08/09/25 01:31 PM
How important is it to get the whole story?
by still seeking - 07/24/25 01:29 AM
Annulment reconsideration help
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:05 PM
Help: I Don't Like Being Around My Wife
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:01 PM
Following Ex-Wifes Nursing Schedule?
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:21 AM
My wife wants a separation
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:20 AM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,625
Posts2,323,525
Members72,045
Most Online6,102
Jul 3rd, 2025
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0