I've tried to find a reference to the "180" thing and in "General Questions II" alone there were 83 references in the past month.

Can someone please point me to a single thread that describes this mysterious concept.

I'm guessing it has to do with turning around (as in 180 degrees), but I'd like a full explanation because I don't trust my intelligence to fully comprehend it.

Thanks

Artor, there is another websight that has a lot of stuff about the 180.

I tried to find the list for you on here and couldn't. I know it has been posted before. Sorry not much help.

I can tell you about my 180s:
At first I stayed home now I come and go on a whim, without any rhyme or reason. On the way out I always say "see you later!" with a big smile

Was miserable am happy and upbeat the majority of the time (really seems to get mh H's goat)

I used to ask how his day had gone, I no longer do that

always said good morning, stopped that too but when he says it to me I am way cheerful and say it back to him

does that help any? There are more that I do but hopefully you get the picture.

Somone will come along that has the list for you.

Artor,

The 180 is a "Divorce Busting" strategy used by Michelle Weiner Davis. Check out her site for a good explanation of it. It revolves around changing those things that don't work anymore. So using that logic....you'd do a complete turnaround if you're getting negative results with any of your actions/strategies. For instance, if you always say "I love you" and your spouse isn't responding....you stop saying it. If you're talking about the relationship....you talk about everything else. I do have an old list that I'll share that has some guidelines....but not all of them will apply okay?

1. Do not pursue, reason, chase, beg, plead or
implore.
2. No frequent phone calls.
3. Do not point out good points in marriage.
4. Do not follow her around the house.
5. Do not encourage talk about the future.
6. Do not ask for help from family members.
7. Do not ask for reassurances.
8. Do not buy gifts.
9. Do not schedule dates together.
10. Do not spy on spouse.
11. Do not say "I Love You".
12. Act as if you are moving on with your life.
13. Be cheerful, strong, outgoing and attractive.
14. Don't sit around waiting on your spouse - get busy, do things, go to church, go out with friends, etc.
15. When home with your spouse, (if you usually start the conversation) be scarce or short on words.
16. If you are in the habit of asking your spouse her whereabouts, ASK NOTHING.
17. You need to make your partner think that you have had an awakening and, as far as you are concerned, you are going to move on with your life, with or without your spouse.
18. Do not be nasty, angry or even cold - just pull back and wait to see if spouse notices and, more important, realize what she will be missing
19. No matter what you are feeling TODAY, only show your spouse happiness and contentment. Show her someone she would want to be around.
20. All questions about marriage should be put on
hold, until your spouse wants to talk about it (which may be a while).
21. Never lose your cool.
22. Don't be overly enthusiiastic.
23. Do not argue about how she feels (it only makes their feelings stronger).
24. Be patient

It often helps to create quick change and stop entrenched conflict. I'm not sure she calls it a 180 anymore....look at "Last Resort Technique".

Hope that helps

Thank you, both star*fish and Growthspurt.

I get the action and intention now and will read some more on it before I decide if it's time to implement.

Thanks again.