I feel like I’m walking in a strange and dangerous territory. It’s exciting on one side and frightening the other. Just expressing some new feelings here, but perhaps it will generate some interesting and informative feedback.

My 27-year marriage finally crumbled a couple months ago when my W told me she had a vision that we were not meant to be together in this world. I still love her, and at this point would welcome the opportunity to try harder as a couple. Now we’re living separate lives and working through the settlement particulars. DD and DS are adults (27 & 25) so it’s only money – did I say that?

I’ve been communicating almost daily (text, email, and one dinner date) with a woman from my divorce support group. I enjoy helping her with her very difficult situation, and the friendship she gives to help with mine – and yes, the attention too. It’s been decades since I’ve paid attention to these signals, but the eye contact, hand touching, wandering foot under the table, I’m not stupid. I know relationships are out for both of us in these early days. That’s like walking over the cliff hand in hand. I’m finding it challenging, and exciting too, to keep this relationship within the bounds of helpful friends. I’m also seeing a former secretary who is interested in having friendship. She’s a little more stable keeping me at a safe distance, saying, “you’re not ready yet”. She’s right.

This is a strangely exciting time for me, while still being wracked by sadness over my loss. I hope I don’t screw things up.

Most of us have unfortunately experienced rebound relationships, sounds like you are playing with two such fires. Yes, they feel exciting, but they are unlikely to lead to anything good. But you know that.

So what is your plan?

AGG

I can't get to sleep I think about the implications
Of diving in too deep And possibly the complications
Especially at night...
Day after day it reappears
Night after night my heartbeat shows the fear
Ghosts appear and fade away...

Well, I'm not as psycho as Colin Hay's "Overkill". I think I've got this under control but... Perhaps it's just my imagination.

I'm having some fun playing with fire amid my heart break, but I can see where things could spin out of control. As a pre-teen I nearly set the canyon afire once like that. I find that my emotions are not very dependable right now. I hope to keep these friends as friends.