My husband and I separated a week ago today.

For various reasons, even though he left me, I moved out of the house (mostly because the house needs a ton of work and doesn't currently have working air conditioning).

I miss my kids enormously, even though I've seen them almost every day. I miss my husband enormously. I want so much to be able to try to fix this marriage, and I just don't know where to start.

Right now, I'm staying at a friend's house (was in a hotel for the first week) and have another free place lined up for next week. After that, I'll ni doubt need to get an apartment.

It has been an especially hard week, because a bunch of his relatives have been in town visiting. My husband, for reasons I can't quite figure out, hadn't told any of them that we were separated, so I ended up telling virtually everyone. Yesterday was tough. My sister-in-law met me and my daughters for lunch. She asked how I was, I said that I'd been better. She asked, "What's wrong?" It never occurred to me that she didn't know (since she had spent the previous evening with my husband) so I said "well, since Dan left me, I've been kind of down."

I used to be very close to my sisters-in-law. We've kind of drifted apart over the years, but we still see each other once a year or so -- sometimes more. Not only am I losing my husband (whom I truly do love) and my family (not that I won't be with my kids, but the family unit we created just doesn't exist anymore) but I'm also losing the people that I've spent every holiday with for the past 20 years. And the pain is just about unbearable right now.

Tomorrow will be a better day, I hope.

Why did he leave you? Have you guys spoke or considered counseling?

EC,

I'm no attorney, but you may want to move back into your house as your moving out could be considered abandonment and could bode ill for you in the event of a divorce/custody battle.

I agree with vowsRsacred in you moving out. You have enabled your H to get the house and there could be a custody battle. When my ex and I were trying to reconcile and then he had to get out of the house, my lawyer said in no terms do you leave that house. Once you leave that house you have basically said to your husband that this house is yours and I don't want it. You can reunite going back to the house...but I would sleep in a separate room. No matter where it would be, laundry room, den, even living room. I would stay there until to protect yourself from losing the house and losing custody.

Your husband didn't tell for he didn't want to be the bad guy. He didn't want to tell his family that you left for fear of family criticizing him.

When my X left...and I filed for divorced with physical abuse on his part. He from then on said you filed for divorce. I filed cause the police told me he was balistic and do you want to live with a man like this. Of course my ex will never see this...cause he was the one afraid to file for divorce for this would make him the bad guy. He has even said to me you were the one to file you are the bad guy.

Take care of yourself and watch your money and insurance and everything else. My ex canceled health insurance and his life insurance. The judge ordered it back for she was so upset with him and gave him a deadline. Of course he didn't get even near the deadline.

Anyways...I wish you the best....and Blessings.