I am very much new here and hope I posted this in a right place. I am wondering for all you folks who have been through all the stages and are so far so good, is there ever a time out of the blue or otherwise where your WS is sincerely remorseful? I spend free time "fantasizing" my WH is crying that he is so sorry and can never thank me enough for not giving up on him. In my daydreams he says that he almost lost the best thing that ever happened to him, he will love me forever, and never hurt me again.. Goodness am I just dreaming? Its sort of easy for me to deposit in his LB right now, not be hurtful etc, b/c I WANT to be a wonderful wife, lover and friend to him right now. I just want him to realize one day all those great things I am. (I wasn't so nice before A) Please tell me this may happen one day, I know it may be a couple years, but someday??

Yes

In my sitch it has all happened just as you described.

But I didn't MAKE it happen

I might have lead the recovery at the outset

But

Mrs.W quickly came around to repentence

She did the work and processed her chit

She owned it & never wavered owning it

She earned her "F" (as in FORMER WW)

I'm very proud of her

Mr. Wondering

p.s. - YOU just can't allow it to be swept under the rug and/or allow or participate in conflict avoiding. You own your chit and process your stuff too. Try to do it...ALL... TOGETHER.

Agree with Mr W Mari. When was your d-day? This generally takes time.

Well thank you Big K...LOL...I didn't realize that I had made amends to you too for my past sleazy behavior...<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Yes, Mari it is a process...it doesn't come overnight, but it most definately can happen, there is much hope to be had! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

GREAT POST Mr. W...It is so wonderful to hear you speak about me in this way...Again, you awe me...

Mrs. W

Mari- as a FWW (former wandering wife), yes, I have cried and begged forgiveness. I am sincerely remorseful. It may take awhile to get out of the fog and the addiction, but if he does that, it is true remorse, imho. I realized pretty quickly that my EA was ridiculous and selfish. For others it is much harder. So just keep doing what you're doing, and you will get there, I have faith.

Thank-you all so much for sharing! This site is hope for me. I know there are no promises in the end, but I need to stay positive.

Big Kahuna -

DDay - 8/16/06
Me- 30
WH- 29
DD- 5

I posted my "classic story" in this thread if anyone has any input.. I am still caring, loving and not being hurtful. I am careful not to force kisses, hugs, etc.. I haven't had hug since DDay, but I don't feel forcing the issue will do any good. SF is almost daily or every other day thing, which I hope is not hurting our situation. It feels good that he desires me and it seems to be the only closeness I get. WH is being open with his cell phone records, internet history, e-mail passwords although its difficult to look at without his animosity. OH - if you know of a good justifying statement of why I am doing this, please let me know! He did admit to me he tried to call her on Friday, but he said she brushed him off.. I emailed her straight away to let her know I knew. Its a set back for sure. His time is accounted for (between jobs) so I hope they haven't got together physically for about 3 weeks.

Just want to let you know that you all are a group of people that I truly relate with. My friends and some family (even his side) are in awe of my support of him. His mother (who we live with) is so grateful I am not giving up. Thank-you all again!

The Wookie (my FWH) even now tearily tells me how much he loves me now and thanks me for not giving up on us.

- Kimmy