Thank you Toolbox! Part of my problem has been does anything do any good. Your response to my thread Changing tactic has given some hope. WIth no response from my H it is so hard to know what to do. Since you felt guilt maybe he will too. I am curious though how did your W and OW even get together to compare notes? I don't even want to be in the same town as the OW.<P>------------------<BR>di<BR>

SDS:<BR>my wife after i sent the OW a letter saying it was over contacted the OW thru i think email or phone, she had been watching me pretty closly, and since i was not thinking rationally (when your addicted you dont know what your doing)she had the OW page me and ask if i would come back to her and what happened to make me write the goodby letter...long story, i tell you about it sometime. but when they set me up it did one thing positively, ENDED THE AFFAIR. now im just trying to rebuild. the last 6 weeks have been the best and worse part of my life if that makes any sense to you. from the MB to Divorce Busting to Adultery, the forgiveable sin, to 3 other books i have read and reread for the past month and psychtherapy counseling and addictive behavior therapy, now I KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING. I'm an optimist, but very well aware of what may or amy not happen to our marriage, but i can be certain of one thing. i understand commitment now, and im just starting to understand what love is. keep you chin up, i look forward to hearing your progress.