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What to do when wife feels no love or desire for marriage anymore.
#17481 10/04/99 10:11 PM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 1,522
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Tom
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Tom
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My wife has apparently not seen the other man since last May. Since that time we started counciling with Steve Harley, but it ended. Have had some good times together since then, but I have felt my wife's heart was not really in getting our marriage to work. She has finally told me that she does not want to be married to me anymore and has threatened several times to move out. I have been trying to meet her needs, but she has finally admitted that she has no desire to meet mine. I grow tired of trying anymore and am wondering if I should tell her to commit to working on marriage or move out or if I should keep on trying to meet her needs and show her I love her. This is very hard to do when I feel no love given in return.<P>Any thoughts or suggestions on how to proceed are appreciated.
Re: What to do when wife feels no love or desire for marriage anymore.
#17482 10/05/99 06:01 AM
Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 207
California transplant to MN
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TimJ,<P>I know you don't know who I am, but I know who you are, and I remember all the ordeals with you and your wife, finding her at his apartment, your vacation, all of this. I posted to you then many times. <P>You made such progress for a time there. I was hoping you were gone because of this.<P>Please keep trying to meet her needs. Perhaps her perception of her needs at the time of discovery and counseling with Harley's was in a different place in priority than today?<P>What about more calls to Harley? Many couples stop doing what works, and end right back up where they started. And old habits in relating are hard, hard, hard to break.<P>Saying a prayer for you Tim. You've come this far, don't throw the towel in yet, okay?<P>
Re: What to do when wife feels no love or desire for marriage anymore.
#17483 10/05/99 09:46 AM
Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 1,522
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Tom
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Mrs. Mush,<P>Thanks for the thoughts.<P>Sometimes I wonder if any progress has been made. Sometimes I wonder if I should have given up long ago. I am sure I will keep trying, but it sure is tough to keep it up. <P>Haven't been gone, but not sure what to say or do anymore.

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