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AKA
VowsRSacred/ VRS
Me 44 WH 46
dd Mar 7 06
Dday 2 Jan 19 07 EA and PA
DD 19
DS 10
DS 7
DD 4
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A pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel around his private area. (wee wee)
Bar tender says "hey you have the ships wheel on your (wee wee) ****dont want to offend anyone*****
Pirate says "arrrr its drivin me nuts"
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It's Captain, CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow!!!
WTF
*** Warning *** Make sure brain is engaged before shifting mouth out of Neutral.
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Are you calling out Mr. Bigpants? LOL! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />
BH = Me 38; WW = 35; DS = 5, DD = 3, DD = 14 mo.
Feb 2006 = EA/PA started
May 19 & Aug. 15, 2006 = D-Days
Nov. 3, 2006 = Divorce Papers - (EA/PA ongoing)
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AARRGGHH -- Avast, ye swabbies -- I've an OM to two that can be keel hauled if you be of the mind to
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No parlay ? We'll just be keel hauling this time ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
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ARRRRRRRRRRR <<<~~~ look ye here swabbies
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*thud*
I'm Pep's pirate parrot. I placed some scallywag parrot droppings on her shoulder, white with a drop of spinach LOL. She so loves that.
ErrrrRRRAAAH! Polly wanna 2x4
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[color:"red"] LOL this is MY pirate profile ... so very very true [/color] The Cap'n
Profile: Some men and women are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any scallawag who stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man - or woman - you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. You are Charlie's Angels without so much "Charlie" and decidedly light on the "Angel." Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone - Man, Woman or Individual of Transgender or indecipherable Sexual Identification - to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where
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LOL...Did me matey BringItOn watch ye ole show Wife Swap last eve? Got a wee bit of Pirattitude today do ya? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Mrs. W <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
FWW ~ 47 ~ MeFBH ~ 50 ~ MrWonderingDD ~ 17 Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered
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Vocabulary
In which ye'll find words submitted by many pirates o'er the years, an' which comprise a loose piratical dictionary.
Ahoy: Hey!
Avast: Stop!
Aye: Yes
Black spot: to be 'placin' the black spot' be markin' someone for death.
Booty: treasure
Buccanneer: a pirate who be answerin' to no man or blasted government.
By the Powers!: an exclamation, uttered by Long John Silver in Treasure Island!
Cat o' nine tails: whip for floggin' mutineers
Corsair: a pirate who be makin' his berth in the Med-...Medi-...that sea 'tween Spain and Africa, aye!
Davy Jones' Locker: the bottom o' the sea, where the souls of dead men lie
Doubloons: pieces of gold...
Fiddlers Green: the private heaven where pirates be goin' when they die.
Furner: a ship which be yer own, not one ye steal an' plunder.
Gentlemen o' fortune: a slightly more positive term fer pirates!
Go on the account: to embark on a piratical cruise
Grog: A pirate's favorite drink.
Jack: a flag or a sailor
Jolly Roger: the skull and crossbones, the pirate flag!
Keelhaul: a truly vicious punishment where a scurvy dog be tied to a rope and dragged along the barnacle-encrusted bottom of a ship. They not be survivin' this.
Landlubber: "Land-lover," someone not used to life onboard a ship.
Lass: A woman.
Lily-livered: faint o' heart
Loaded to the Gunwales (pron. gunnels): drunk
Matey: A shipmate or a friend.
Me hearty: a friend or shipmate.
Me: My.
Pieces o' eight: pieces o' silver which can be cut into eights to be givin' small change.
Privateer: a pirate officially sanctioned by a national power
Scallywag: A bad person. A scoundrel.
Scurvy dog!: a fine insult!
Shiver me timbers!: an exclamation of surprise, to be shouted most loud.
Son of a Biscuit Eater: a derogatory term indicating a ****** son of a sailor
Sprogs: raw, untrained recruits
Squadron: a group of ten or less warships
Squiffy: a buffoon
Swaggy: a scurvy cur's ship what ye be intendin' to loot!
Swashbucklin': fightin' and carousin' on the high seas!
Sweet trade: the career of piracy
Thar: The opposite of "here."
Walk the plank: this one be bloody obvious.
Wench: a lady, although ye gents not be wantin' to use this around a lady who be stronger than ye.
Wi' a wannion: wi' a curse, or wi' a vengeance. Boldly, loudly!
Yo-ho-ho: Pirate laughter
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Arrr me be a Cap'n too..
this be spelling trouble
we's need another boat !
** edited for strong language **
Last edited by brownhair; 09/19/06 03:31 PM.
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Arrr me be a Cap'n too..
this spells trouble
we's need another boat ! *snort* did'ja read the disclaimer at the end of the test??? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ *Note. School Psychologists, Social Workers and Clinicians should be wary of using the TOTLAPPI when qualifying students for IDEA services, DSM IV identifications (under any axis) or as a part of any professional assessment. Medical professionals are hereby cautioned not to use the TOTLAPPI as a tool to determine appropriate medications and/or dosage. Lawyers are hereby notified that the results of the TOTLAPPI are not admissible in most state and federal courts with the notable exceptions of The Bahamas, French New Guinea, Madagascar and Wyoming. Amnesty International has requested a moratorium on the TOTLAPPI in Death Penalty Cases until the American College of Psychiatry and the British Psychological Association can complete a twelve-year longitudinal study into the TOTLAPPI's efficacy rate and cultural bias. This tool was designed for use solely by Pirate Captains and Web Surfers. Please do not attempt this in any professional setting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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From TalkLikeAPiratedotcom... Top Ten Pickup lines for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day
(We came up with these in an effort to interest The Other Dave (Letterman) in TLAPD. His staff liked 'em, but alas, his show was "dark" the week of Sept. 19.)
10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?
9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?
8. Come on up and see me urchins.
7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.
6. I'd love to drop anchor in your lagoon.
5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if fired me cannon through your porthole?
4. How'd you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?
3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.
2. Well blow me down?
And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …
1. Prepare to be boarded.
Bonus pickup lines (when the ones above don't work, as they often won't)
They don’t call me Long John because my head is so big.
You’re drinking a Salty Dog? How’d you like to try the real thing?
Wanna shiver me timbers?
I’ve sailed the seven seas, and you’re the sleekest schooner I’ve ever sighted.
Brwaack! Polly want a cracker? … Oh, wait. That’s for Talk Like a PARROT Day.
That’s the finest pirate booty I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Let's get together and haul some keel.
That’s some treasure chest you’ve got there.
Top Ten Pickup Lines for the Lady Pirates
By popular demand ...
10. What are YOU doing here?
9. Is that a belayin' pin in yer britches, or are ye ... (this one is never completed)
8. Come show me how ye bury yer treasure, lad!
7. So, tell me, why do they call ye, "Cap'n Feathersword?"
6. That's quite a cutlass ye got thar, what ye need is a good scabbard!
5. Aye, I guarantee ye, I've had a twenty percent decrease in me "lice ratio!"
4. I've crushed seventeen men's skulls between me thighs!
3. C'mon, lad, shiver me timbers!
2. RAMMING SPEED!
...and the number one Female Pirate Pick-up Line:
1. You. Pants Off. Now!ROTFLMAO...<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Mrs. W
FWW ~ 47 ~ MeFBH ~ 50 ~ MrWonderingDD ~ 17 Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered
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<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />
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ARRRR !!
You be making me coughin' with laughin' !
I has to cut back on this tobacco.
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