StartinOver - please forgive me but I don't know, or can't remember, your situation. I'm going to assume that you are a Christian yourself, from the thread and the general statements you made. If I am wrong in that assumption, please correct me.




No, you become a Christian because you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Savior, recognizing your own inability to "earn" salvation through your own efforts. A result of accepting Christ is a desire to become more like
Christ, which is the lifelong process of Sanctification.




There are many answers to that question, but the most common, imho, is that to stop going to church would obviously raise questions that they don't want asked. Remember, attendance at church saves no one. Everyone in a church is a sinner of one sort or another. And none of us is perfect and we all do lie to ourselves, and subsequently through the denial of sin, to our Creator and Lord, thinking like a child that God can't see through our subterfuge.



I'm not sure from this what sort of "preaching" and "serving" you are referring to, much less in what type of church or denomination. Suffice it to say that the primary answer is what I said previously, to change one's "routine" would draw attention to something that they don't want brought into the light. Darkness and Light can't co-exist together and light reveals things that are hidden in the dark. Others can see when light is shined on areas of darkness.




Of course they should. But sin is a real power on an already sin-natured body. The "war" of the "flesh" and the "spirit" is real, and is one of the reasons that all Christians are warned to put on the FULL armor of God, as the Scripture reveals it.

Even Paul, considered to be the foremost Christian by many, struggled with the "flesh" and his being still in a "fallen world." Romans 7:7-8:17 is a good discussion of this struggle that all believers face. The "key" to the struggle is humble submission of our will to God's will, no matter what we are "feeling."



They SHOULD know better, and in most cases the DO know better. But then knowledge alone is insufficient. It takes a willing choice to surrender one's will, no matter what. Once we entertain the idea that "it's okay because.....(fill in the blank) we are back to the issue of "liberty" in Christ and the misuse of that liberty.

Sin is deceptive and in many cases it "feels good," at least for a time. But it is destructive and, especially in leaders, destructive to many, especially to those who themselves are "weak in the faith." It's one of the reasons why Satan DOES target Christians....to damage their relationship with God, as well as their witness to others about God and living for God.



This is, sadly, an all too common situation in churches today. It's indicative in many cases of churches who are trying to "conform" themselves to the world so as to be "appealing" to many. What happens is a sliding away, gradually at first, from the fundamental truths of Scripture. Emphasis is placed, inordinately, on the "good" and "consequences" for sin are downplayed. The "idea" that we should "judge" someone else's behavior is twisted into a "thou shalt not judge" misinterpretation and misrepresentation of what Scripture really says to, and about, Christians and their accountability to both God and each other. It harkens back to Cain's famous question to God, "Am I my brother's keeper?" According to God, we are.

The Matthew 18:15-20 instruction on church discipline is lacking in many churches, but it was intended not only to protect the church from the effects of unaddressed sin on other believers, but as a means to help the sinner realize what they have been doing and to repent of it, with the goal of full restoration to church fellowship.

Why is it lacking? People like to "pick and choose" as if they know better than God. They want to build membership rolls and be appealing to others, even to those who do NOT believe the fundamental truths of the Word of God, yet who still want "membership" in the church. In short, they "fear" Man more than they "fear" God. Sad, but true.

Lastly, another reason for this is a fulfillment of Scripture prophecy about the "latter days." People WILL gather around them people who will speak to their ears in ways that "tickle" them with what they WANT to hear, not what they NEED to hear from God.

God bless.

Forever Hers - I really must protest. You can't be supportive of affair marriages and post what you just posted. You want to have it 2 ways here.

BK - Okay, I'm willing to discuss it. What do you see as the dilemna here that you think is trying to "have it 2 ways here?"

There is no such thing as a brief answer to the question. I will say this I often find it interesting that more is often expected of our pastors -- while they should have a higher standards in order to be placed in that position -- I do believe that our expectations are often too high.

This was a huge piece of my struggle. Because the OW pursued FWH in presence of my children. OW active in church, invited my family to her church. At first confrontation he told me if I have to go over to a "friends" to watch Christian videos to keep my sanity then I will. He would not listen to christian music with me before affair. Bought me a DVD for Christmas and now has his favorite bands.

Satan does not cause the affairs. He presents temptations in our minds. We make a chose to succumb or not. I viewed the affair as an attack by Satan on my home, my family, my husband -- but I did not blame him. My husband made a choice to succomb to temptation. The fact that he is "saved" does not make him immuned.

Yes, the stronger our walk the less likely we are to succumb to temptations of the flesh. Less likely is the key word here. But the thing is that our walk is something we all to often take for granted. Our ego's get to big and the next them you know "Wham!"

a good resource that explains this is lifetimeguarantee.dot.org.

As we were going through the crisis several people, my m-in-law included, looked at me and said "I know you would never do that!" I corrected them. Although, I would like to believe that to be true. Although, I have stood up for what I believe in in the past -- dating and my best friend -- I am not immune. Let me stray just far enough from my focus on the Lord, present the opportunity, and there I am. I know it! Respecting it is the only real defense I have. I've had uncomfortable situations in the past, even in my married years -- but knew enough to know I was treading dangerous ground and set appropriate boundaries.

Bottom line is this. We still have a free will. He won't go against it. If we are not sufficiently spiritually grounded we are vulnerable. Going to church, being active, and study does strengthen our resolve -- but does not make us immune to sin. We do it all the time. Everytime I get resentful and bitter I am sinning.

This is simply my POV. But I do not view his A as anyworse that my LBs. More painful perhaps, a deeper betrayel. But I do not view myself as superior -- I too error in my ways.

Very, very good explanation. Thanks for posting. I have seem many Christians who insist that you cannot lead a moral life if you are not a Christian. You just explained why that is not true.
Mulan