I need advice from all parties. I'm freaking out very hurt and confused I feel like i'm trapped with nowhere to turn

Ok, these are the facts and a bit of history
My b/f and I have been together for three years now both of us 25-26 years of age
he has two children by different women none of which are mine. (although I'm possibly pregnant) His daughter (age 3 in Alabama) he pays child support for and his son (age 5 In Georgia) he doesnt. for a strange reason the mother of his son won't put him on child support and he won't put himself on it We've recently moved from Alabama to another state (where i own a house) away from both children and mothers to supposedly get "us " and make a future together so he says. Neither of us presently have family where we currently live.
I've always had a feeling that he was still in love with the mother of his son they were engaged back when they were younger and over the course of the years I have actually broken up with him just to see if he would go back to her but he didn't. I've told him if that's who he choses then he has that right. I've almost encouraged him to be with her but he won't leave me. He was in the situation of moving here with me or going back to his life with her and his job which was a great job. I know for a fact that she wants him back but he chose to move with me. He claims to have no feelings whatsoever for either of his children's mothers' and he claims to want to spend the rest of his life with me, even is going as far as linking and setting up accounts and future investments ie retirement plans etc.but doesn't want marriage. He currently is the major source of income in our household.
BUT THEN I started finding letters that he had been hiding written to the mother of his son about 1 month ago

These are the letters copied verbatim.

(Letter 1 dated approximately a month ago and sent off two weeks ago)

Dear Sue,
I'm just writing this letter to you to let you know that this will be my last letter to you. You have to understand that there are things that i must do now in order to get closure. But for you to not let me speak to my own son is wrong. I love you(Bye Sue). You have been my first in so many ways. You have given me so much you have given me my very own son. But I guess i'll say it like you said to me in your last letter written we wouldn't work out but maybe someday we will. I doubt it. So i will be the first to say that I will miss you baby and maybe one day we can start over when we get ourselves together. Love John Sr.

After this letter was sent he was able to speak to his son. During this time I did not tell him that I found the letter instead I told him that I knew he was talking to her and out of respect for me and my feelings the only thing that should be discussed between the two of them is his child. Nothing more.
I was going through a box of cards that was put up in another room and I found:

(Letter 2 dated 2 weeks ago and sent yesterday)

Dear Sue,
I know that I said that the letter I wote was the last letter to you but i can't turn my back on you even though you did it to me. From the first time in the movies until now I still love you just like I did so long ago. I feel that now i should love you just like I am now and not try to get back because of all the wrong I've done. I'm just not ready to have anyone in my life right now and i dont know if you have someone in yours or not but the only woman I have in my life is Katie (his daughter from the other relationship.) I will be starting a new job on Oct 12 and working part time hours at another job. It just like my old job when I was there with you so i will be sending John Jr. something every week. I can't lie even after all these years I still love you like we are still together. I can't even commit to anyone else because of you but i know it wouldnt work between us either. Now God has given me a second chance at life to save my self and now I don't have time to be hanging with the fella's anymore or anything like that i guess you can say i've grown up alot. As for John Jr. I will tell you and make sure that I tell him when i see him that i will always be there for him unlike my Father who wasn't for me. To John Jr. Hey buddy how are you i know you're getting big and I will have something to give to you the next time I see you, but that won't be any time soon.
Love always
John Sr.


Help!!!!!I would appreciate womens opinions should I confront him beings though he purposely hid the letters. What would you do. I don't think I wanna end it just yet but instead want to have an effective way of solving the problem or maybe planning a strategy so i won't be left with all of the bills and no job.
I would also appreciate mens comments on maybe an interpretation of what exactly is going through his mind.
I want to leave but I can't do that now cause as i said he is the one handling all of the bills I dont exactly get why he would move to another state when he's had plenty of opportunities to go back to her. I know now that I do need to get a job ASAP and move on with my life but reality check is until then I have to depend greatly on him for the bills. I don't have any family that would help because i myself come from an abusive childhood therefore I have no contact with my parents. Its hard to even look at him without getting teary eyed because I honestly love him and I have stuck it out this long. He knows that something is wrong but I haven't confronted him yet because I'm trying to figure out an approach.I'm emotionaaly drained at this point. Any advice on how to co exist with this man until I get myself together. what approach should I use when I confront him.

Do you think he may be trying to keep access to his son? She may withhold contact from him unless your s/o butters her up. He's lying to her as well. I'd like to know what the veteran's out there think of you contacting OW and letting her in on the fact that you're with s/o. Did you meet him while he was with OW?

I thought exactly the same thing that maybe he's trying to keep access but my thing is why doesn't he just go to court for visitation and pay the child support that way she has no control. We are well off enough to afford the child support payments but when I mention that he "goes into his shell" without a reply. I also just found out that his most recent letter(the longest one above) hasn't been sent off yet when he has the opportunity to send it. He keeps hiding the letter in differnt locations around the house. He has also been acting very distant and cold towards me for 2 days now. I met him 3 years ago and he had been away from her for 2 years prior (in a different state). however I found out a couple of months into dating him that he had maintained a long distant relationship with her(chasing her constantly as if she had himwrapped around gher fingers ie. letters, phone calls) up until the very day that we met so i really dont know if I can safely say they havent been together for 5 years or 3 years now. I do know that when i met him he was having a very hard time with accessto his son. He hasn't seen his son in over 2 years and I remember before he wrote the first letter he tried to call for his son and she told him "You haven't called me in 6 weeks so don't call me now. This is my phone so if you want to talk to your son you get him his own phone" His son is about 4 years old. She does get mad and hold his son over his head by denying him access. What should I do?????