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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 134
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 134 |
Ok this might sound like a stupid question but can you get a STD from oral sex? My husband swears that he didn't have intercourse with other women, but I know for a fact that he did other "stuff". I don't know that he might be lying to me about not having intercourse so I should get checked anyway, but anyway, can you? I will be so humiliated going to the doctor getting checked for that. Here I've been with only ONE man in my entire life (sexually) and to have to get check for that will make me feel like I'm some dirty rag.
Married: 15yrs
Me:38
WH:40
2 kids
D-day Sept 06 and again 7/23/08
Currently in counseling
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
I would get checked for STDs if I were you. Swallow your pride and save your life.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
You shouldn't feel dirty. You aren't the one at fault here. (((VegMom36)))
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,808
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,808 |
VegMom, I am sorr you have to be here. I know hoe you feel on not wanting to be tested because of embarrassment. How well do you know your OB/Gyn? I called mine in tears to ask for the testing. They got me in much quicker than you can normally get in. He and his staff were wonderful.
My doctor said I was the 3rd wife that week he had tested for STDs because of a cheating spouse. He sugested a book for me to read on affairs. He was just great about the whole deal.
Thankfully, all of the tests came back ok.
As Mel said, swallow your pride and make the call.
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 833
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 833 |
((((( VegMom )))))
In a word: Yes: A number of STD's can be transmitted orally.
Get thee to thy Doctor. Sadly, most MD's are VERY experienced with this request.
The humiliation is NOT yours. Nor is it your fault that you need to be tested. That fault lies squarly on the shoulders of you WH.
I hope the testing will turn out OK.
Stay Strong!
WTF
*** Warning *** Make sure brain is engaged before shifting mouth out of Neutral.
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 709
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 709 |
VegMom36 --
I don't know your current relationship with your husband, but I would make him go with you. (If he refuses, go by yourself anyway because you NEED to get tested!)
I'm the betrayed spouse, but I drove my wife to one appointment to get checked and then to pick up the results. She went to the other by herself because of my work.
He should give you at least this much support.
However, remember, he may be still in fog and not willing to do this. Don't take his lack of support (if he doesn't go) as a permanent sign -- he may be trying to dodge any negative consequence.
Go get tested.
Blessings
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 134
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 134 |
I would hate to go to my usual OB/GYN because we know her well. She went through 2 of my pregnancies with me including when our second son died, so we are very personal with her and I would hate to have her know about this. I do get checked yearly because I am on BC. Do they normally check for STD's when they do pap smears?
Married: 15yrs
Me:38
WH:40
2 kids
D-day Sept 06 and again 7/23/08
Currently in counseling
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Vegmom, you are her patient. It is her job to TREAT your health. Her personal opinion is not the relevant issue here.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240 |
Vegmom,
My x contracted herpes from OW. I was told that the most common way for a man to contract genital herpes is through oral sex by a woman with cold sores on her mouth.
I was tested for STDs by the Ob-Gyn and no, it is not a routine test. You have to request it. Yes, it is embarrassing, but the piece of mind is totally worth it.
My X was tested for HIV and syphillis separately but the results were sent here so I could read them.
Good luck and I'm sorry you're here.
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