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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 8,016
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 8,016 |
Now those of you who were betrayers, this isn't a slam against you. Just something I have been thinking about since it is so difficult to get through.<P>Believe me, I know. I have been going through it for the last 8 months. We all talk about how the betrayer goes through it, but so do we. We get dumped by a spouse who is totally resentful for ANYTHING we try to do. Someone we have spent half our lives with, someone who made a lifetime commitment to us, someone we had children with, etc.<P>Yes it hurts. It hurts real bad. We understand the pain the betrayers are feeling and we wish to help them get through it.<P>Comments?<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A> <BR>
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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 1,232
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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 1,232 |
Acknowledged .... and just one more thing that I'm overwrought with guilt about.<P>I don't know how some of you do it. I don't think I have the intestinal fortitude to be put thru the wringer like you have been and NOT lash out, file for divorce and put a pipe bomb in the mailbox.<P>You're a finer person than I ... but we already KNEW that!
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 8,016
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Joined: Apr 1999
Posts: 8,016 |
MAya, Thanks for the idea! ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/wink.gif)
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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 1,232
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Joined: Feb 1999
Posts: 1,232 |
You did NOT hear that from me! LOL
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 3,247
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Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 3,247 |
Chris - thanks for saying it. I've felt it a million times. My h had a plan (such as it was) when he talked w/ me and left. I felt as though I had been dumped into the desert w/ no water. My best friend, my confidante, my other half, all of a sudden gone! My whole life, my whole future, was changed in an instant and I had nothing to say about it. I've never felt so lost. I've felt all along that I understood the betrayers withdrawal a lot more than I would like to. <P>I think that was the hardest part - even more than the betrayal - the loss.<P>But - I'm still trying!!!!<P>Thanks again.<P>Lori
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 719
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 719 |
Chris, you know what's even worse..." I still love you, I just can't decide" Can I get someone to please scratch the knife wound in my back, it's itching. Thanks
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 719
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Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 719 |
Chris, you know what's even worse..." I still love you, I just can't decide" Can I get someone to please scratch the knife wound in my back, it's itching. Thanks
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Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 207
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Joined: Oct 1999
Posts: 207 |
or how about -<P>I KNOW I want to stay married for the rest of my life.....<P>You hear that for weeks on end, and then one day you hear:<P>I KNOW I want to stay married for the rest <BR>of my life.... but I don't think to you!!!!!<P>OUCH!!!!! O
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 426
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 426 |
Chris, <BR>You are correct in this that we are in a forced withdrawl. I am being forced to give up the feelings for my wife by her actions. I wonder if once they leave if there is any withdrawl from us even though they got what they wanted. I wonder if your wife ever thinks of what she is doing to your family. <BR>This is probably the month that we actually start living apart. The people that want our house are close to selling thiers. I will always wonder if she will miss anythng that we had. This affair has been going on so long though she probably doesn't remember any of the good stuff, just the stuff that she compares the affair to.<BR>We are still in the same house but I try and not be there because I know that she doesn't want to talk or even be around me. This hurts to much to be around her.
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