I stand corrected.

What about getting her that pin or key thing that Mobil has. That way she can use it only for gas

I'm not scared or upset about this, just more annoyed than anything. We actually have been doing quite well lately. She had a rough day at work yesterday, so she called me up and asked if I would meet her up for a drink at Happy Hour. This was the first time she's actually asked ME to do something with HER instead of me always having to suggest something. We had a good time, and I just listened to her vent for about an hour. This stuff just prolongs withdrawal and delays recovery, and it's hard to be patient when your WW is actively doing things to prolong your recovery. Oh well, I'm done venting.

Dear 007,

get yourself a GPS tracker and you will know for certain where she is driving when you are not with her

Pep

GPS INFO [color:"red"] <~~~ click link [/color]

JW:

I have to ask about this so I understand:

This stuff just prolongs withdrawal and delays recovery, and it's hard to be patient when your WW is actively doing things to prolong your recovery.

You are not talking about your Happy Hour with your W are you? Because if you are, you are missing the point....

She called YOU. And wanted to spend time with YOU, telling YOU about her day. Not calling the OM.

This should indicate the speeding of the recovery...

Now, if you are talking about monitoring and confirming NC? If you feel it is delaying you, then you can stop, and pick it up as you need to.

She cannot enforce a boundary against you about snooping, She lost that right, by straying in the first place.

But unless NC is established, true recovery can not begin, that's true.

LG

LG,

I was referring to my previous post where I stated that I had a suspicion that my WW had gone further underground and purchased another calling card to call OM (he lives 1000 mi away).

Pep,

I don't care if her car goes to the gas station, I care what she buys while she is there (calling card to call OM without me detecting). Again, the OM lives 1000 mi away, so visiting him is not my concern but rather calling him.

007 would have set up monitoring of her Discover card in the first place...put a voice activated digital recorder and a GPS tracker in her car...and then eliminated OM for good measure <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I agree that her calling you for happy hour was a good thing

Hey, I already put a voice activated digital recorder in her car (hearing one of their conversations is what led me to kick her out of the house on 11/8 to which she agreed to NC), and GPS doesn't tell me anything other than she was at work when she was calling OM from the payphone in the parking lot. I'm pretty sure if she goes and sees OM 1000 mi away I will find out without the GPS. I also have contemplated calling in a favor from some coworkers that travel to a plant by where OM lives, not that I'd have them eliminate him. I'd like to retain my 007 status, thank you very much.

hehehehe...fair enough.

Okay, after a session of very thorough snooping, my WW checked out clean. There was nothing charged to her discover card. I checked her wallet and found a receipt for just gas on Tuesday, and it turns out she paid for the gas using her debit card, but for some reason it hasn't shown up on our online statement yet. Usually those transactions happen in real time because I knew she ate at St. Louis Bread Company for dinner last night. Turns out it was just a false alarm (thank God).

Hang in there, Jim...this is all part of the ride. I'm happy for you that she's not broken the NC agreement.

Best wishes,
SD

Best Christmas present ever! I just found out I got a $4045 raise! I better stop posting here and get to work. Do I have marital problems? I can't remember anymore. I got a big raise!

LOL

Congrats on the false alarm and on the raise.

Take your W out for a special dinner tonight.

~ Marsh

Friday night is eat out night anyway. Instead of eating at a $$ restaurant, we'll go to a $$$ restaurant.

Up we go to the top

Bump for Jim and NC

Congrats, Jim!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

cudos... have a great $$$ night out! No relationship talk tonight, just reconnecting!

SD

Well, I knew I was having a bad weekend. WW was going to a wedding in her hometown (she didn't want me to come). She stayed at a hotel. Well, flash forward to yesterday. I checked her checking account online, and I saw two transactions on 12/16 from the same gas station: one for $20, and one for $10. I know the last time she got a prepaid calling card it was from a gas station and it was $10. I know she keeps all her receipts and writes them down in her check register every week, so I went in her wallet, and lo and behold, there was a receipt for a prepaid calling card. I told her I knew she called OM from the Hotel room on Saturday. Why? Didn't she know how much that hurt me? She said she could call him anytime she wanted, and that she only has been calling him once a month. She was pissed off that I was snooping and demanded that I stop what I was doing. I told her I wouldn't. She said OM was 1000 mi away, nothing to worry about. I told her he was 1000 mi away when she visited him, fooled around with him in the hotel, looked for jobs and apartments in his hometown, and was talking to him about leaving me. I said I am trying to protect myself from getting hurt again. She was just furious, and told me she didn't want to be married to me, and that if I insisted on not letting her go, she would not kiss me or sleep with me ever again.

After I was in bed she came to bed crying. I told her everything would be okay. She said did I even know why she was crying. I told her to tell me. She said she has no one to talk to now that her mom passed away last year. I told her she could talk to me. She said that I didn't want to be just her friend, I had conditions. I said I will be your friend as long as you are a friend to me and do not hurt me, that was my condition. I told her we were very much in love before and it could happen again. We went to sleep. She still would not agree to NC.

This morning I got up and left her a not explaining to her why NC was so important to me. I haven't heard from her.

I can't keep doing this. This is killing me. I pride myself on being an MB pro after only a few short weeks, but why can't I handle my situation. The pain and betrayal is just so intense. I can't keep having her break my heart every few weeks by talking to that A-hole OM. What should I do?

How long have you been in Plan A, Jim?

Interesting... did she say why?



Someone who has nothing to hide would not be so pissed off.



How did you react to those threats from your WS?



Sounds like you're ready for plan B.