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#1765584 11/03/06 06:39 PM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 2
A
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 2
Hi everyone. I posted some time back, and I wanted to update everyone. I followed her rule, and let her alone. Then after nearly a week, she called me one morning to ask me if I could take her somewhere she needed to go. I said why sure. So when she got there, she was a bit uncomfortable, but after a few mins, she saw that I wasnt talking about us, and we were laughing like old pals, and all was fun. We did the thing she needed to do, and I suggested we go to get the kids costumes together since we were out and I knew she would want to be a part of that. So she said sure. That morning we also had a meeting together at our sons school. We went to the school meeting, and after that she decided she wanted to go home and take a nap and she would go get the costumes later that night together. So to her surprise, I said "ok". Well I went back home, and it wasnt 15mins, and she called me and said she was bored, and wanted to know if I still wanted to go get the costumes. I said sure! So we did. We were flirting..and laughing, and all seemed great. I then was hungry, and asked her if she wanted to go eat. She said if I buy the costumes, she would pay for lunch. We had lunch and laughed, and seemed great. Went home, and all seemed fine. Friday, quiet. Saturday brief conversation about the kids. Sunday we spent the whole day together at the zoo and a road trip about 3 hours long to take the other son to his fathers. She talked the whole time up there and back, it was almost like we were catching up. Then I went home, and that was that. Monday, brief phone in the morning from her to tell me about one of the kids throwing up on her. I offered if she wanted she could stay at my house, and we could take turns getting up with the little guy. She said she didnt know. Well she did end up staying the night, and we went to bed with no intentions, but as we talked, and lauged, and made a small move, and she responded and then before we knew it.. it was on. And it was all passion..she held me tighter than she had EVER held me. 2hours later, we went to sleep snuggling. Never done that before either. We ended up staying the next night together, and snuggled that night too. No love making though. Then from then on out.. random phone calls. Laughs.. all seemed on track.. then saturday morning she came over to drop the lil ones off, and since then she has been kinda cold. Not alot of contact. Brief.. she admitted she was watching me to see how my couseling was going, andf looking at the changes and likeing them. Whenever I ask her if there is anything we can do, or is there a chance.. she always says I dont know... Is that what she thinks I want to hear, or is it the truth.. she truly dont know. I need more signs. She said she has been, but they are not aimed. If she would just says maybe.. or no.. or I am thinking about it.. or I still care. or you stink get away!! Something other than I dont know.. Since then we havent really talked too much. Did she start to have feelings again and got scared? I wish I knew more..
Glen

adkg12 #1765585 11/08/06 07:56 PM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 192
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 192
12---How long you guys been separated? Who initiated it? Is this your first marriage? I take it it not your wife's first marriage. I think you are demanding quarentees which are imposbile to give. What will happen?? Who knows! By what you describe it could go either way. Maybe it depends on what both participants want. It takes two to tango. She is looking for changes in you she had beter be looking for changes in herself also. Don't be the "identified patient". johoman

johoman #1765586 11/19/06 11:30 AM
Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 10
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Joined: Oct 2006
Posts: 10
it sounds a lot like what i'm going through right now and if you look at the progress you have made it sounds good it seems like you had something that was working ( doing things together going places talking about family things ) keep doing those things they really fill up the love bank quickly ask her to get a cup of coffee or go to lunch see a movie whatever just do things together. if she's not ready to talk about R yet , don't. when she's ready to she will do corner her about it just take it slow.

i don't know your whole situation but i'm sure it didn't happen overnight and won't get solved that way either. Just enjoy the time you have together and maybe you'll find that you will be spending even more time together and be building a stronger R in the process Good luck hope things go well


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