Hi everyone. I am new here. I divorced my husband, a good man that I loved "as a friend...like a brother"...I was miserable during the marriage so I thought divorce was the answer. It was not. We've been divorced 7 months. He told me since July 1998 that I was the "Love of his Life"...I did not know he was dating anyone serious although we talked often...he was always evasive and would just tell me he was "dating around." Well...one day we had fight and he told me he did not even want to be my friend anymore. I was crushed!!!!! Now remember, I crushed him - he NEVER wanted the divorce and it was the worst time of his life (so he says). Within 24 hours, I felt God's hand in my life like I had not felt at anytime during our marriage. I drifted away from God due to a rape... Anyway, God touched my heart and brought me back to Him. Then, I felt that God was impressing upon me to reconcile my marriage. I did date and have a relationship AFTER our divorce and my XH knew about it. When I called him to attempt reconciliation, he was kind and loving but not responsive. Then, a few days later, I found out he was dating someone steadily...then a few days later, he told me he cared about her but did not know if God was leading him to marry her...then, within a couple of day, he told me he was in-love with her...then a couple of days later, he told me that God had told him in his dreams and at church that she was the one for him to marry. I AM NOW THE ONE THAT IS CRUSHED. We were a bradybunch family...two kids each that we each had custody of and were a family, kids love each other and us, for 7 years... I just pray and pray. I do not know whatelse to do. I really love this man and I had to work through a lot of issues but he tells me he no longer loves me and is going to marry this new woman he has been dating 3 months. Please pray for us and give me some good GODLY advice.

The best reconciliation is one you've already made - to the Lord. Please keep that in mind over the coming months. A couple of thoughts regarding your post -

1) The MB principles on this site could easily apply to your situation. Have you read the other parts of this website? Don't stick to just the discussion boards, but read up on Plan A & Plan B. See how you can improve yourself for any future relationship (with or without your XH).

2) It's unclear if you and your XH go to the same church. Regardless, have you talked to your pastor about any of this (your renewed relationship with God, your feelings about your marriage and desire to reconcile, etc.)? If so, what did he say?

Dear Mistake-I don't think you know what you want. By divorcing your husband you set yourself like a ship with out an anchor. In your next marraige be sure that you commit yourself 100%. You had at LEAST 50% of the blame in your marriage. Why should he love you? Are you lovable? It sounds like you have been married before but didn't learn from that. johoman