I have a questions for you if you could possibly answer it for me or tell me who I could possibly ask. My wife and I went through a biblical portrait of a marriage a while back and she lasted about 2 months with it as she is a very head strong person and could never be a submissive wife. Not to say as the class teaches you that I would purposely make her submissive but she could not let me make my own decisions or let do something without a comment. So I recently told her that I have often wondered why a couple of other people that we know who have wifes have been able to do this and I know from what I have observed is that they have found joy in their hearts and are willing to do what God asks them to do. She threw a dart back at me saying that it is because they love their husbands. When we were going through the class my wife and I were doing very well and we had fun together and am pretty sure that she loved me at the time but what should I say to a comment about that? That is not why they do it but the do it because they love God first?

What did you do, about submitting your life to serve and protect her?

Everything. I did everythin according to Biblical portrait of a marriage, I served her by being a provider and doing everything that she asked for to make her happy according to what she communicated to me.

Older thread and my first post, so I apologize in advance if this is not okay.

I am a Christian, a woman, and I fully submit to my husband. However...this doesn't mean that I am in any way a mouse. My job is to keep his head straight when he can't. Keep him between the lines, so to speak. A helpmeet. The man I'm talking about is headstrong and proud; there is no way I'm going to accomplish my goal in life (to make his life better) if I'm afraid to stand up and say what needs to be said to him. Often it's not what he wants to hear.


lol..Yup, that was a dart alright. Instead of allowing yourself to react to her comment (which was what she was after), maybe try reaching beyond the effect she's looking for and finding out why she said it in the first place? The comment is not the problem; it's a symptom/sign of the problem. A 'cry for help'. She's unhappy about something. Find out what.

I think this is what was meant by 'turning the other cheek'. To ignore the hurts that we experience and instead focus on the hurt that results in others when they throw their slings and arrows at us. I don't know you, and I don't know your wife or your marriage/situation, but if I had to guess based on what you've written in this thread, I wonder if maybe she resents the idea of submission? She see submission as a humiliating shackle that she is expected to wear. She has no desire to be 'put in her place', because she feels it is demeaning and trivializing. How can she love someone who thinks she is worth less than he is somehow (not my own thought - just my imagined projection of what her line of thinking might be)?

Do you feel she is worth less than you somehow? Why is having a submissive wife important to you? And no fair answering "Because the Bible says so". The Bible says a great many things that we don't always follow to the letter, and often the context has been lost to the interpretations of others whom we respect and listen to...although they may not be correct in their conclusions. It is always safer to understand what we each truly believe within ourselves. Truth needs no defender. Seek to understand what YOU believe. If you believe something that others say is untrue, ask why it is untrue. Jesus is the Way, the Life...and the Truth. If it is true, it will lead you back to Him and the Truth that He spoke.

Sorry for the long-winded reply. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />