This may be a little long, but please stick with me because I'm in so much pain. I have hurt my husband! We dated for 3 years and have been married for almost 9 years. We have a 7 yr old daughter. As I grew up my father constantly cheated on my mother, causing great pain and issues for me. I have been on Zoloft for a while trying to get over everything. This all happend just before my H and I got married. Over the past few years, my H would blow up at how I treat him bad. He says I talk down to him and treat him like a child. He says that I don't love him (which I do very very much). We would talk through it and he says I would be different for a week or two and then back to the old same stuff. Well, this time, he says he's done. He says he can't allow himself to be put in the same place where I step all over him again. We have an awesome friendship. We can sit and watch movies together and laugh and stuff...but he isn't sure he loves me anymore. He says he's not willing to let himself get hurt again. I have told him everything I could to show him I will not be the same old person. He's never been this serious before. He says that maybe one of us should leave for a little while to see what happends. So, I packed my bags and was going to take my daughter and myself to my mom's. My husband said it killed him to know that I was pulling my daughter out of her own bedroom/house to go somewhere else. He has no where to go. So, he told me to stay. We talked with our friends last night and they asked him if he was ready to live without me. He said he didn't know but if I have to have an answer RIGHT NOW, the answer is Yes...he's ready to live without me. But its our daughter that is holding him here. He says he's miserable. I love my husband with all my heart. I've tried so hard to be nice to him (cards, etc...) it makes him made. He says its too late, I should have done that a long time ago. What do I do? HELP ME!!!!!!!! He wont talk to anyone about it so couseling is out. He just doesn't want to talk about it.. not even to me! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!

FM,

You may want to read His Needs/ Her Needs. Another on we found very helpful is The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman.

He probably has a need for "admiration" and you've provided the opposite. BTDT.

Good Luck