It would be nice if you somehow digital documented the conversation about picking them up for church...as you always had, such that her saying "no" and then failing to actually take them to church can be used against her.

Also...keep ALL grocery receipts to demonstrate you are buying healthy foods. Even write down the time you gave each child vitamins and had them brush their teeth.

See if your church offers any counseling or sign the kids up for professional counseling. Don't even tell her...just take care of it (not sure about not telling her...maybe mention it AFTER you've arranged it and taken them to their first session...doing such in writing especially to get her initial likely impulsive response.

If you know the day that she took pictures then perhaps revisit your journal for the night prior indicating carefully any real reasons the kids could have been tired that day. Maybe they stayed up a bit late having a blast with you doing something special, maybe they had trouble and anxiety getting to sleep because they have expressed some trauma over the whole ordeal, maybe y'all got up early for something special....etc. It would be nice if you can refer specically to your notes to refute ANY documentation she may come up with.

She'll have notes...YOU'LL have a trunk full of documents.

Next time get a quick photo of the other cell phone. She MAY just lie in court about it's existence. Also, if you can, subpoena OM's cell phone and home phone records.

Mr. Wondering

LOL

That just sounds so silly. Kids are always looking tired. Don't sweat this...she's just trying to "even" things out. It won't work though. You sound like a great father.



That's a good way to meet her EN's for affection.

How did she respond to it?



Keep planting your seeds and trusting God to bless your efforts.

~ Marsh

I would make up weekly menus to keep for evidence. Be sure to limit the junk food. It may take time, but introduce healthy food - ie: fruits and vegetables for snacks. The newest nutrition guidelines advise 6 to 10 servings a day of fruits/vegetables.

Here's a very healthy delicious soup that even my little one's enjoyed. It only took about 45 mins to fix, and in your situation you will have enough left overs to have the next day and still have some to offer your WW...(she'll be impressed w/ your cooking abilities.)

Minestrone Soup

3 tablespoons olive oil
1 cup minced white onions (about 1 small onion)
1/2 cup chopped zucchini
1/2 cup frozen cut italian green beans
1/4 cup minced celery (about 1/2 stalk)
4 teaspoons minced garlic (about 4 cloves)
4 cups vegetable broth
2 (15 ounce) cans red kidney beans, drained
2 (15 ounce) cans small white beans or great northern beans, drained
1 (14 ounce) can diced tomatoes
1/2 cup carrots, julienned or shredded
2 tablespoons minced fresh parsley
1 1/2 teaspoons dried oregano
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
3 cups hot water
4 cups fresh baby spinach
1/2 cup small shell pasta


1)Heat three tablespoons of olive oil over medium heat in a large soup pot.

2)Saute onion, celery, garlic, green beans, and zucchini in the oil for 5 minutes or until onions begin to turn translucent.

3)Add vegetable broth to pot, plus diced tomatoes, beans, carrot, hot water, and spices.

4)Bring soup to a boil, then reduce heat and allow to simmer for 20 minutes.

5)Add spinach leaves and pasta and cook for an additional 20 minutes or until desired consistency.

Makes about eight 1 1/2 cup servings.


~ Marsh

To ForeverHers,

I read your post to Dogfood and your brief description of your situation caught my attention. I wanted to see if you would give me your own comments to my situation and how they may be similar or different as my WW has also moved into her own place.

I appreciate whatever you might have to say.

Well, until FH shows up, give us an idea of what you are feeding your little ones.

Eph, after reading your thread, I have started reading the bible. Even my FWW can't believe it. There is power there.
MB is a witness to it.

believer:

I feed them nearly the same things as when we were all together.

Breakfast is typically cereal or grits or a waffle or pancakes.

Lunch for DS5 has been a ham sandwich and some chips. I need to do better with fruit here. DD3 eats with WW for lunch.

Dinners lately have been more eating out. We eat a church on Wednesdays and their menu varies each week with a meat and 2 veggies.

I went to Sam's today and got more fruit and some quick dinner type things, so hopefully I can get on a regular menu. My kids are really picky eaters - they got this from WW because she is the same way. I eat nearly anything <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

bendover49:

I am so glad you have started to read God's word. Since you mentioned FWW, I assume you are in recovery or have recovered?

Off to pick up the kids. I will check in later.

When I dropped off DD3 at WW house today, WW was wearing the sweatshirt I gave her on Saturday. I told her it looked good on her.

I have IC today so I expect to be raw the rest of the day. Just thinking about my plan A, at this point I think I want to try to make it to what would be our 9th anniversary - June 6. That would be about 5 months of a real plan A.

I would also like to see if she would be willing to attend a MB weekend or maybe A Weekend to Remember done by FamilyLife (There is one here locally in May) or even A New Beginning done by Family Dynamics.

Well IC turned out to be quite uplifting. We discussed how I have changed and grown in several areas. Being in a place of brokenness for some time now, I have learned to recognize my feelings and not suppress them. I have been humbled and God has given me grace.

I thought I would be raw the rest of the day, but I feel quite happy now that I have realized some of my changes. I prayed today that God would give me enough grace and strength to get through today - but he gave me more!

Still waiting for FH.......

Your kids are young enough to change their eating habits. Forget the chips and get fruit, veggies. They will learn to like them. Buy apples, oranges, bananas, grapes, carrots, tomato juice, dried fruit, etc, and have them sliced and ready for snacking. A fruit salad is a good way to get it down them.

I call mandarin oranges

CANDY

Mr. Wondering

I picked up some 100% fruit snacks and a pick package of mandarin oranges fruit cups. Mr. W, don't come near my house for a candy fix <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Don't sweat it.

I avoid confederate states like the plague

I get stuck in Atlanta now and then visiting the in-laws and it's barely tolerable.

Dang Reb's everywhere

Mr. Wondering

Eph,

I see where Mort talk to you about how him playing/living with his kids made a hugh impact with his then WW.

This is the same thing with MWIL. He would build tents in the livingroom and let them eat dinner in there sometimes. He bacame so good, fun, loving with something that was very near and dear to his wife's heart (the kids) that she couldn't help but respect and love him for that.

Part of my plan A was being a better dad. My kids are 5 and 2 so I know what you are dealing with with your own. While my wife was in the Fog state I would take my kids to breakfest without her. I did ask if she wanted to go. Sometimes yes sometimes no. When we did go without her we had fun and we would always stop on our way home to get her coffee that she liked. I would take our kids and go and do more than ever. I made us three the part of the family she would be living without if she D me.

After the fog lifed she told me that my interacting with our kids made a big impact on her. Psst. I never new or saw the impact while I was doing it. It took time.

Don't know if this angel was mentioned yet, but there it is.

Thanks M2L - being a great dad and engaging with them is becoming a part of my plan A activities. I know she is taking notes on how I am doing things wrong - I want to eliminate all that so she can only see that I am doing right. I know that will impact her, but like you said I may never see the direct results of that impact until MUCH later.

We are gonna convert you yet, Billy Yank!

M2L - MWIL poked his head in here and I am going to read his whole thread - I only read a few bits and pieces so far.

Jim - to answer your question on the other thread, no I have not exposed to OM parents because I haven't spent the time yet to find them since the court date. Good idea on seeing if the PI can locate them.

Heading home from work - will check in later tonight.

Eph - okay, per your request on your other thread, here are the links you wanted.

First timer - help needed


Miracles happen when you are obedient to God


Withdrawal - What is it like from those who have experienced it & how to deal with it


Forgive? Trust? Really? Has anything been learned in the past year?


God bless.

WW called while I was at work today to let me know that DS5 was sick again and she made an appointment with the Dr. for 8:30 in the morning. She wanted the kids to stay with her tonight so she could get to the Dr. in time. I agreed, and will note this for future reference in the event she tries to use it against me. Thinking about it further, I probably should have said that I would take him so she really couldn't use it against me. I will do this in the future.

Anyway, I took some clothes over for the kids tonight. I asked her if she wanted me to hook up the new tv and DVD player I took over while she was giving the kids a bath. her response was she did not want me out in the living room by myself. Immediately a red light went off in my head - she has something to hide because......

The cable company was over last night and she now has cable internet access, and she is using the mysterious laptop. I know for a fact she has a new e-mail address I just don't know what it is and I am 100% sure she is carrying on the A over the internet at a minimum. I need to get that keylogger on there somehow. Maybe when I subpoena the laptop I can get it installed.