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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 209
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 209
I really seem to dwell on certain things at certain times. Not so much about his ONS that he had 15 yrs ago more about what has happened since then during the last 15 yrs. I fear that there could have been more, he insists that there hasn't been anything else since that time. I seem to dwell on it and ask him over and over if he has done anything else and tell him why it bothers me or how a certain thing bothers me because of how his ONS was with someone he didn't know. (I can't help to wonder how it started, what kind of conversation ect. at work led to him sleeping with her). He gets upset then and tells me to stop asking that he's already told me, how do I just go on from here and stop at these nagging questions? Do I just pray that if there were other things they'll come out sometime? I don't want to push him away.

Joined: Nov 2006
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Welcome to MB...has he done anything since then to make you not believe him? Has he betrayed your trust or lied to you since then? Have you gotten into counseling? You obviously hold a lot of resentment towards him and still do not trust him. Since this encounter,has he done anything to make you not believe what he is saying or doing? How are his actions? Is he secretive? Do you have access to his emails? cell phone calls? etc etc....If he has been honest, truthful and faithful since 15 yrs. ago, you need to learn to let it go, trust again, let go of the resentment, never bring it up again, etc etc...if you continue what you are doing, you are only going to drive him away.....


God Bless A "If God brings you to it, He will get you through it."
Joined: Mar 2006
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thanks lovegod, his ONS happened 15 yrs ago I only suspected then because of the "pubic crabs" there were no other signs, he denied. I found out 6 mo ago. I asked a handful of times over the 15 yrs if he cheated then and he always said no. I guess I worry about what else he could have done over the last 15 yrs, he has never been secretive, I have always had access to all of his stuff, BUT this was an ONS with someone he didn't know, there were jobs he had that he COULD have done things like this again, that's what I fear, he says he never did anything again since that time 15 yrs ago but it scares me because he got away with it basically for all these yrs what made him stop?
He denied this for 15 yrs, I don't want to drive him away but how do I believe him? He hasn't done anything untrustworthy and is completely doing everything to rebuild trust since finding out. Thanks again


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