People come from different backgrounds. It could be she is just being kind. Depends on where and how she was raised.
However, we know from experience that it MIGHT mean something else. When you don't know for sure, you find out.
All of it put together does sound scary.
This is a good time time to discuss the four rules for a successful marriage - see link.
http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3900_rules.htmlIf he understands these things, he will understand your concern.
If he doesn't want to protect your feelings, then you have a reason to be concerned.
Any man who loves his W and cares about her feelings will understand and help when she comes to him with a concern.
Read through the four rules, and talk to him about protecting your feelings by not doing things with her away from work requirements.
If he agrees, then probably things are OK.
If he gets angry, and or says you are controlling, or crazy, or argues with you, then I suggest you dig deeper. Don't get angry, or argue with him, just know you need to find out more. If you accuse him, or if you get visibly upset, he will know he has to hide things better, and it will be more difficult for you to find out the truth.
What he is doing may be totally innocent - and he might not have thought about it much. However, if he still wants to do it after you voice your concerns, you can be sure something is going on. He may not realize it yet, but that would be a sign that he is at least beginning or involved in an EA, and the addiction has started and is affecting his decisions.
If that is the case, and he doesn't realize what is going on, you can get more information and work on restoring your marriage.
Don't be afraid to monitor his phone and computer use, and other things so that you will know the truth. You need to know what is going on before you can deal with it.
I can tell you that Dr Harley knows what he is talking about, and this material works. Read all you can, discuss things with him, and tell us what you learn.
I suspect there may be other warning signs, or else you would not be here?? Do you have other concerns?
SS