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I've been following your story but had not commented. You are doing a fantastic job.

Old timer here and I've been on both sides of the fence.

Quote
And, for you recovered folks: does the FWS eventually--after withdrawal--come to recognize that that ECSTACY was irrational, abnormal emotion? or do they continue, for the rest of their lives, to long for that?


From my experience, YES, once one's head is pulled out of one's rear, WS's DO recognize that this feeling was not reality. Matter of fact, even before withdrawal, he will eventually begin to realize that it is not all that he thought it was. It will get old and tiring trying to live a secretive life in the dark. He will long for a normal life back.

It will run it's course. I hate that it is not fast enough, but I promise he should come to his senses one day... probably after you go to Plan B.


Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail. ~ Kinky Friedman
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LilSis

If you want a chuckle
check out the date Susan joined MB

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Suz is my girlfriend ... my OLD girlfriend

LOL

Pep

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I say that you are SPECIAL..cuz SUZ came out for your thread...

SHE'S A QUEEN!!!

HI, SUSAN!!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Last edited by mimi1254; 01/10/07 01:56 PM.

I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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I noticed that, and was going to comment that it must have been Susan--NOT Al Gore--who invented the internet! I'm in awe! A woman ahead of her time... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> Thanks for dropping by!

Just dropped the boys off with WH, and took the excuse of having to report on this afternoon's visit to the dentist to come in and talk to him (not that I would have needed an excuse to breeze in, but it gave me a topic anyway). A few minutes of happily sharing kid-related info, and I was ready to leave. His expression was very, very guarded--almost angry--and I didn't want to push him by going any further just then. I figure the roses and the TM were pretty good for the day, and I still have tonight when he drops the boys off.

As I went to leave, I approached for a hug, and he grabbed my arms as if to hold me off... then sort of relented with a sigh and gave me a one-armed hug..the kind where he's sort of got his body half turned away to minimize contact. I'll try not to be too affected by that as it is crack fix day, and I sort of put a wet blanket on it by unloading his children on him. How thoughtless of me...

The roses--all three--were in a...well, let's call it a "man vase." I think it was a pop bottle. (that's Northern-speak for soda, Mel)

Okay...now I am going to make the appointment.

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The roses--all three--were in a...well, let's call it a "man vase." I think it was a pop bottle. (that's Northern-speak for soda, Mel)


WOW!!!! That's major!!!


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What, that pop=soda? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> or my WH's ability to improvise?

I sent my appt. request! (pat self on back)

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Did he get the "pop" bottle at the PARTY STORE?? lol <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Hello,

Below is a link to a infidelity website that will give you a very good FREE ebook if you sign up for their email list. The document is called "31 Reasons to Stop an Affair". I had to buy the book back in spring of 2005 and I've been sharing it off-line with friends every since. I presume they will then solicit you will all types of offers and emails but I think the ebook is worth it.

Anyway, I always recommend that you get the document, print it off and leave it laying around where your wayward spouse will find it as opposed to handing it to them to read. You can't teach a wayward and they will be hesitant to read an assigned reading. Even if they do...they won't get past a page or two before they discard it as bunk. However, if they "find" it...their curiousity as to what YOU are reading will intrigue them and they may get through it. I didn't receive and you shouldn't expect immediate results. The document, I feel, only plants seed which may germanate over time. Usually, one or two of the "reasons" really strike home.

The author of "31 Reasons" also discourages the BS from reading the document but I did and found it empowering, insightful and moving myself. It assisted me with the choices I faced as well and I encourage you to read it too remembering YOU MATTER TOO. It may also helped keep you on the straight and narrow during this vulnerable time in your life and marriage.

Click below for the link
[color:"blue"] How to get 31 Reasons to Stop an Affair [/color]

Mr. Wondering


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
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Okay...I'm not familiar with that one. What is a party store "supposed" to be called?

Puleeze edjukate me whul I drank muh soda.

Ohhh...sorry. I just lobbed a big one in there, but I couldn't resist. I do know it was uncalled for. (tee-hee)

Just lob one back and we can call it a draw, 'kay? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

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party store = liquor store


Jim

BS - 32 (me)
FWW - 33
Married 8/31/03
No kids (but 3 cats)
D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA)
NC agreed to - 11/8/06
NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07
Status - In Recovery
Jim's Story
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Okay...I'm not familiar with that one. What is a party store "supposed" to be called?

well, you will be SHOCKED to hear that in non-Michigan parts of the country they call them CONVENIENCE STORES! LOL


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Puleeze edjukate me whul I drank muh soda.

I'll help Mel out with this one...

YANKEES!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Mrs. W <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

P.S. Backing Mr. W up regarding the "31 Reasons"...It was one of the first things that I read that got through to me...


FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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Okay...I'm not familiar with that one. What is a party store "supposed" to be called?

well, you will be SHOCKED to hear that in non-Michigan parts of the country they call them CONVENIENCE STORES! LOL

Even more odd...In Georgia, they call them PACKAGE STORES...So, as far as that goes, I gotta give that one to Michigan! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Mrs. W


FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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Sorry, Mr. W. for that juvenile OT post just after yours. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I have that book already. I also read it against the advice of the author. (I'm telling you, he's just asking for BS's to read it when it has THAT disclaimer on the cover.) I thought it was a good book, but I'm reluctant to leave it lying around, as the kids might come across it. Honestly, I don't think it's time for that right now, anyway. WH has been preached at, yelled at, belittled, moralized to, reasoned at by EVERYONE that he cares about...NOTHING penetrates the fog. Thirty-one more reasons, no matter how succinctly and convincingly they are presented, will make a difference right now.

He's a very intelligent guy. At some level, he MUST KNOW this is a huge mistake, but he can't break the addiction. No amount of "reasons" will convince him that he can or should give up the crack. Like any addict, he knows deep down that it's bad for him, his kids, his family, his reputation, that it will destroy his future and his happiness, but he cannot give it up.

Maybe as the fog is lifting (which is not yet)...??

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A NON-CONFLICTED WH..would have thrown the roses in the trash..as in "I'M FINISHED WITH HER...ICK"....

BTW: Good job on the appt. request... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Last edited by mimi1254; 01/10/07 03:16 PM.

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Abu calls his the Kwik E Mart

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So we have:
--liquor store (sounds creepy; I'd never go to a "liquor store" for a bag of chips and a road pop, eeewww.)
--convenience store (waaay to long...look, I can't even spell it)
--package store (what's THAT all about?? sounds like UPS)

and then there's "PARTY store." Which one would YOU rather go to?? We just know how to have FUN here in the mitten (and the UP, too)

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Where I live it's called the "ABC STORE"..

NO KIDDING!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


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Is that new sig line in my honor, pep? Because if so, it should be "never wear panties to your child's Christmas concert." We must correct HRH. (of what monarchy, anyway?)

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Sweet Potato Queen ~~~> Jill

do a google search

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