WW and I are separated 3 months. Little over 6 years married, 7 yrs together. We are 3 mos. into D and Temp. Parenting Plan is in effect which details the rules. Not much hope to reconcile M right now (we LB'ed into that for a year), but we were going to try and be civil to each other, at least for DD and D sake.

DD (who is 4) was sick and I stayed home from work with her yesterday and took her to the Doctor. DD tells me yesterday that STBX's new B/F has stayed over at her apartment a few times and that they stayed at his place this past weekend. Apparently, STBX and her B/F are in love. STBX and I have discussed this in the past and she said she would never do this while our DD is around.

Anyways, since STBX and I have discussed this in the past, I got pissed and decided to call my atty and advise him of this and he was going to call her atty to tell her to back off. I spoke to STBX and advised I called my atty.....all heck broke loose.

She called me every bad name in the book and said there will be no friendship or discussion other than that which is spelled out in out TPP. She even cancelled Christmas as a family. Does not want to see me or my face. Fortunately, STBX legally has to drop DD off at my house by 1:00 on Christmas day so I'll get some time with her.

So, did I overeact? Should I have called STBX first and told her of my displeasure (even though she already knew) before i called the Atty?

Lot's of tension right now and the holidays's (for us) are ruined.

DD heard us fighting on the phone and was pretty upset, so we are trying to make sure she still gets a great christmas and plenty of loving from us.

ht,

Nope. You did exactly what any loving and caring parent would/should do. If, as you say, there is no chance for reconciliation, and divorce is inevitable, than the gloves are off and it is throw down time.

I am not sure of your situation, but I am assuming by the fact that she has a BF, you are the BS and she initiated this D. If that is the case, then you have to think of this as war. You need to do what is best for your D. And I don't think that strange men sleeping in the same house while your D is visiting your STBX is providing a healthy environment for her.

Fight for your D. If that means you get called a few names, so be it. In the scope of life, a few bad names really means nothing.

Good luck to you.

ttg.........no chance for reconciliation. Yes, I am the BS. This is a new BF (3-4 weeks old), not the one's she's messed with the past year. She claims that DD likes this guy and that they ONLY kissed in front of DD. Supposedly he ONLY slept on the couch since he lives 1 1/2 hours away and couldn't (or wouldn't) drive home. I smell Bull S#@t.

If you read my stuff over the past few months you'll see that she has many issues. For some reason, I still love and have feelings for W, but am going to IC to try and get rid of that.

The WS is dangerous to you and your child. See about getting custody and don't enable the A or the WS. Let the attorney know about the verbal abuse and strange men being around your child.

Btw, don't share info with a WS. They can't handle it.

L.