Thought you went to bed!?!?! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Couldn't sleep. To much on my mind so ithought I would come here and read.

Translation: "I am worried sick that you are going to out me for the POS I am in this community and that in addition, you are going to break me and leave me eating from an Alpo can"

Stay on his azz in a legal sort of way. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Boy I feel bad this morning.

Can anything good come from the events of last night.

Enlighten me on what POS is?

piece of sht

I guarantee

Last night moved you one step closer to:

Either

1. Recovering your marriage, or

2. Your individual recovery

Either way...YOU WILL BE OK

Again, Trust His plan.

Nobody, including you, has any idea if last night tipped the scales one way or another. Worrying about it only robs TODAY of all it can be. Move on...it happened, you can't change it. Live in the NOW.

NOW is HOW.

Mr. Wondering

p.s. - good job documenting this stuff. I'm unfamiliar with your unique state claims, however, maybe your lawsuit against OM can include a motion, at the onset, for a restraining order against him to stay away from you, your wife and, most importantly, your daughter. The threats you have recorded last night should assist you with such.

OK I have caused enought turmoil last night. I think maybe I should back off of that for a few days. My question is what can I do now to make her see that Plan A pHB is back. I feel so much like a failure this morning because I have been doing so well in showing her what I am becoming. Last night ruined all I did. Now she will just be waiting on me to do something else. But really all I did was go to get pix and got caught then followed her. I know that was stalking but I never lost my cool. But I also didn't talk to her either to show her I was calm. She only saw me getting pix and following her. I am really confused.

I think it did move me closer to ind. recovery. As far as WW goes, I found out that she made OM and OM B call and appologize to WW B W. but it wasn't really truthful because she made them. But maybe this will be an eye opener for her. She got to she first hand everything this could cause. And just maybe she will see what type of person OM really is. OM called his B and gave him phone #'s of me,BIL cell and home. Now wiil she look at that as protection or will she look at it the way it is, SIN taking its course and running absolutly crazy?

pHB,

you keeping low today??

Very low, I haven't even talked with DD yet. Staying low and trying to remember all that happened.
I still don't see what I did to cause all of this. I made one statement about BIL calling me and everything breaks loose. It was the blame game. I think my WW turned what happened last night into blaming her B. not sure of that but that was when it all hit the fan.

ok, like others have said, let it go and it seems like you are.

What about fixing some other part of the house? Something you do alone for now. You work on that then you have football this weekend. Let it roll along until you talk to Steve H.

I agree with MrW. Something did happen one way or another and thats good b/c it is moving the whole sitch along and that is good for you.

WW stopped by house minutes ago to talk about what happened last night. Said everything I had done for the past five mths was vengeful and hurtful towards her. I nodded and shook my head. She said over the last couple weeks you have been better then last night you did somthing crazy. I said look WW I know I have done somethings that I shouldn't have done, but you just said that over the last couple weeks I had done better, but I admit I failed last night but I will never be perfect. I am trying to better myself for me not you. I have moved on but I was aggitated yesterday and things got to me and I acted instead of thinking things thru. She said I could have had you threw in jail last night but I knew if I did, DSS would have to start looking into DD1 again as well as DD8. I asked her not to judge me for what I did one day. Look at the past couple week as you stated and see that I am growing.

I said all I ask is for you not to take DD8 around him, she said I can't promise that, well I will get the restraining order this week against just that because I have not been talking or doing things that will hurt DD8, but DD8 has stated notto just me but to others that she doesn't want to be around him. WW said you can't do that just like I can't control who you take her around. I said I can and I will (Then I probably LBed when I said) and you know that may affect the investagation. WW got mad and was leaving saying I should have had you arrested.

A couple more tidbits from conversation:
WW-I don't know who you are anymore
ME- No one know who you are

WW-you are doing everything to hurt me
ME- if thats how you see it

WW-Why can't you just move on
ME-Why want you let me

WW-I am never coming back to you
ME i am sorry for you

WW-Why can't I have peace
ME-You need to answer that

WW-I'm not God I can't forgive
ME-I know your not

I may think of a few more but I think I did ok until the threat of DSS come into play. Even did ok with reverse babble as shown above.

Oh yeah, She said I can't even live a happy life life right now. I said is that because of me, because you said I have been great over the past 2 weeks or is it something else that is bothering you. She said NO. I nodded

Now she has called my pastor andasked him to call me about the restrianing order. I told him my DD is my priority and it is my job to protect her. DD told me that OM held her down in the floor and tickled her until she laughed. I told him WW is upset because she know who holds the keys although I am not wanting it to be like that.

What was your pastor's opinion about the restraining order?

Great reverse babble, BTW.

~ Marsh

Finally someone speaks. His said do whatever God tells me to do.

What do you think about all this Marsh, I get no good answer from anyone I talk to because they all say to move on that its over and protect yourself. I know that her heart is hard right now, and it seems that these 2 individuals are truely in "love". I already found out that they have a wedding date set. I mean how far do i go trying to do things when it looks so obvious that she will not turn back. I looked into her eyes today and I saw nothing except a wife who was hurt from all the trouble her husband is causing. At what point do we cut ties and let go.

I find that incredibly lame.

You mean he didn't take a position?

What was his point in calling you?

Was he trying to do your WW's bidding?



I HIGHLY recommend that you CAREFULLY choose who you will discuss your M w/.

You ARE moving on and you ARE protecting yourself.

But, you are still trying to save your M. What other people think about it is THEIR business.



They are NOT in love.

They are addicted to the A. And the only thing she cares about his her addiction. She doesn't CARE for OM, she only cares about how the A makes her feel.

It doesn't mean she can't love you again.

I'm a FWW, I had shut my heart off to my DH, but once I established NC, got through W/drawals, and got my head on straight, all my feelings for my DH PLUS new tender ones came back.

Others here can tell you the same thing.



She is behaving EXACTLY like any other WS. EXACTLY!


When YOU no longer want to be married to her.

~ Marsh

WW called him and wanted him to talk me into not taking RO out on OM. I told him my reasons and he said ask God and he will tell you. He did offer up do I think DD needs to be in custody battle.His position is he thinks WW should suck it up and do what is right in God's eyes. But he thinks she is to far gone. He thinks I should move on without her and continue to look to God.




I am doing the best I can but I feel that it is me and MBer's against the world.


That is hard to see



How will I know that. It seems I have this feeling but I don't want it to be Satan circumstances that cause this feeling. I want God to show me and lead me.

What should be my next move. I feel lost now with nowhere to go.

He called you b/c WW asked him to talk you out of getting a restraining order against OM. Does that mean he agreed w/ her?

DD is not going to be in a custody battle, but you and your WW may be.



Well then stop discussing your M sitch w/ 'the world' and just talk to us about it.



Look, you're going to have to 'man up' here. Regardless of how you feel right now, you need to protect your DD from OM. You go ahead w/ that court order to keep him away from DD. THAT IS VERY IMPORTANT!!! You need to follow through on your threat to press charges against him.

And then you talk to SH. He will help you understand how Plan A works and will help you understand the nature of A's.

You HAVE a plan, WW doesn't. Don't you see the advantage you have?

Where is your DD and why aren't you w/ her?

~ Marsh

No he definatly does not agree with her. He is pro Family for sure. He tries to talk to her each time, but he says its like talking to a infant.


WW knows if I say or do something, SS may remove child from home. Pastor feels that may be the best thing for DD1. I am beginning to feel that way. I have held onto hope for a while in hopes of being a family. But I will not sit back and let OM and WW adopt this child I have raised.

[/quote]Well then stop discussing your M sitch w/ 'the world' and just talk to us about it. [/quote]

Trying t o do just that.


DD wanted to go with GM shopping. I thought that may be a good idea just in case tempers hadn't settled from last night and I didn't want her here just in case. She should be here shortly.

I have a plan but I have to discipline myself also. With no disipline plan doesn't work.

As far as RO against OM I am going to see if WW agrees 1st then take action if not what I want to hear. I will give her until Tuesday since Monday is MLK day and I really can't do much then anyway since lawyers office is closed.