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No questions or comments? Did I miss something? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />
Last edited by paranoidHB; 01/16/07 09:49 PM.
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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pHB... cudos, Man, you are growing!
Learning the ropes. Talking the talk, and walking the walk.
That's what it takes!
Feel the empowerment? Being in control of your words and actions? Amazing, isn't it?
You know what the right pedal on a piano is? It's the sustain pedal. That's what you need. Keep playing the KEYBOARD (plan A) and keep your right food on the SUSTAIN pedal, and things are going to start improving for you.
There will continue to be ups and downs, so roll with the coaster and don't let anything take your focus off the daily improvement. This is where the rubber meets the road!
Drive safely, SD
BH - me 53, ONS 1979 FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003 Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Thanks SD I thought everyone had left me for a while
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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I'm here pHB,
Let me say that your wife's words to you today were my wife's words to me in late summer. Today she loves me. I hope this gives you some hope.
Steve gave me about the same advise as to you. My wife never wanted to talk to him either. Today she believes that he is one of the best in the nation. Me too!!
No advise here tonight pHB, just let your talk with Steve sink in some more for tonight.
M2L
ME BH 36 - FWW 33 2 kids DDAY May 06
Sometimes waywards can be like Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
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AI fan here, too. Actually its the W whose the fan, but I racked up about 2 of the 15 hours a week Harley recommends by just sitting there holding her hand, cuddling a bit, and talking about the show. Much better than garage sales, eh?
SD
BH - me 53, ONS 1979 FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003 Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04
***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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Thats cheating!!! Watching TV <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
M2L
ME BH 36 - FWW 33 2 kids DDAY May 06
Sometimes waywards can be like Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
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No questions or comments? Did I miss something? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> Hey PHB! You did great! Thanks for including all of those details. It really sounds as though you've got your footing now. How'd it feel talking to your WW today? I'll be praying she'll agree to talk to SH. Did you tell her she could do it by phone? Also, why does SH think you're almost ready to go to Plan B? And how will you know when you are? ~ Marsh PS: Those singers were AWFUL tonight. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />
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Let me add that today will go down for you as the day that things changed for you. You sound much stronger than even a few days ago.
Use your new found plan and keep up the good (hard) work.
M2L
ME BH 36 - FWW 33 2 kids DDAY May 06
Sometimes waywards can be like Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
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You did great! Thanks for including all of those details.
It really sounds as though you've got your footing now.
How'd it feel talking to your WW today? Felt pretty good. I felt as if I was in control of my words in a way she could actually hear me. I didn't get any positive response but it sure felt good. I'll be praying she'll agree to talk to SH. Did you tell her she could do it by phone? Yes I told her I would set everything up for her. I pray she will talk to him to. Also, why does SH think you're almost ready to go to Plan B? And how will you know when you are? He heard in my voice the frustration. He could tell I was about to the point where she wasn't worth it. When he asked me, I said I just said that to someone the other day. He told me to stay on plan A for a while and get back with him and let him know how things go from here. WW called me last night at 10:30 and had a general question for me. I thought it was my DD and I answered "hey beautiful" WW said "what" I said OH "I thought it was DD calling but the same goes for you too" silence then she asked the question. It was kinda funny and maybe see will think about that too. I don't know, I will continue to sow seeds and let God water, hoe, cultivate and let them grow. Keep my foot on the sustain pedal according to SD
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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Guess since i talked with SH everyone has left me. I sure hope not because I need daily encouragement, I don't get that from anyone around here. All I get is move on, she doesn't deserve you, I wouldn't take her back etc. etc. the list goes on and on. My true friends are here feeding me.
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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Guess since i talked with SH everyone has left me. I sure hope not because I need daily encouragement, I don't get that from anyone around here. All I get is move on, she doesn't deserve you, I wouldn't take her back etc. etc. the list goes on and on. My true friends are here feeding me. I just popped on. We haven't left you. Crazy day here. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> How are you doing this morning? Did you speak to your lawyer yet? When do you get to see DD next? ~ Marsh
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We're here, but you still need to take the plan your and SH worked up and run with it. Most things won't change day to day - it takes a long time. You are growing and learning about you and how you act towards your WW.
Have you called your lawyer yet?
Everyone here has said all along that this maybe the hardest thing you have ever done in your life. It is not just a little hard or hurtful, but very hard and hurtful. It is worth it in the end though. Othes have made it so it can be done.
I think you are entering the detached loving part. You love your wife, but you are taking a step back from her. This is good and will help you.
M2L
ME BH 36 - FWW 33 2 kids DDAY May 06
Sometimes waywards can be like Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
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Crazy day here. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> Kinda boring today here How are you doing this morning? Pretty good Heard a sermon on Romans 12 and it talked about forgiving those who persecute you. So I will need to pray about that. Did you speak to your lawyer yet?
When do you get to see DD next? Lawyer hasn't called me back yet? DD will be with me later this week but I asked for her to be able to go to church with me tonight
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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Posts: 3,862
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Want me to send my kids your way to liven things up for ya? LOL DD will be with me later this week but I asked for her to be able to go to church with me tonight Good. Did you ever get that paint for her room? ~ Marsh
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Good.
Did you ever get that paint for her room?
~ Marsh Not yet, DD never wants to go to Lowes to pick it out. I was thinking of doing that tonight or Friday when I get her. Its probably a good thing because my house looks like a man's house. I need to clean on it for about 3 or 4 hours. LOL
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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Posts: 3,862
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Not yet, DD never wants to go to Lowes to pick it out. I was thinking of doing that tonight or Friday when I get her. Its probably a good thing because my house looks like a man's house. I need to clean on it for about 3 or 4 hours. LOL LOL @ "Looks like a man's house." Eeeeeew! LOL Enjoy your evening w/ DD. ~ Marsh
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Some of us actually have to work sometimes. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
Jim BS - 32 (me) FWW - 33 Married 8/31/03 No kids (but 3 cats) D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA) NC agreed to - 11/8/06 NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07 Status - In Recovery Jim's Story
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Called WW last night 4 time to talk to DD and never heard from her. This is getting old.
Me-34 (BS)
W-33 (WW)
DD-7
Married 3/28/1992
DDay 8/4/06
Seperated 8/18/06
Plan A Start 1/4/07
**A Warrior does not give up on what he Loves, he finds the Love in what he does.**
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Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,862
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Called WW last night 4 time to talk to DD and never heard from her. This is getting old. Document it. Did you hear back from your attorney yet? ~ Marsh
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Time to get your DD a cell phone?
~ Marsh
Last edited by Marshmallow; 01/18/07 11:39 AM.
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