I am F$%^&NG STUMPED!!
H left on his little pleasure trip without us tonight...so, early in the day, i RAN google desktop.
Left it for several hours..and checked...
Damned am I tonight, that I cant even trace one of his emails...
Nothing....
I ran his yahoo, hotmail, msn accts....NOTHING!!!!!!
Why could that BE???
I have run searches on "terms" I have already FOUND beforehand, but NOTHING is turning up!
This is HIS Puter he has had for YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
H mysteriously walked in the door the other night with a "new" issued office puter....very odd
never walked in with that before.
I am wondering now if he might have simply transferred the hard drive??
Anyway...
Geez...
I installed google desktop on the hopes I would find answers to my questions...but, I cant find a damned thing related to his accounts that I know of....that I KNOW he has accessed to within this puter...
I am going f&*^king MAD now!!!!!!!
I know I am not a crazy woman!!
I trust my gut instincts and my ability to read body language...and trust my own gut.
let ALONE having a H take a VACATION without his own flesh and blood!!!
I am raging here!!
I cant install any fricking thing on this puter!!
BUT>
He SAID this puter is being replaced and now...so essentially, it is now our asset.
Jesus..
H is on a plane at this moment going to his pleasure trip without his wife and child...
he booked this trip without consulting or asking me...
I am in a freaking frenzy here.
Ok....this puter is NOW our property....what the ****** do I do??
I am beginning to just lose hope and am finding peace with just signing with a divorce lawyer over all of this crap..
BUT I have NOOOOOOOOOOOOO proof of my knowledge!!!
I feel like a freaking blind bat with 20/20 vision here.
I wish I had a chat with someone right now to calm me...chat would help so much.....really....
I need human contact right now <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
been too much crap over too much time...not to mention this trip witho0ut us.
I am interested in a plan to monitor puter activity from abroad now...
any suggestions??

What can I install during his little pleasure trip?
If anything, his available puters onhand will be legal 4 me to snoop on.
Jesus christ........how can a man take a vacation without his family/child............makes no fricking sense
thanks for your help

emmawtrs - Your "problems" seem to stem from a "culture clash."

Just how much do you know about Indian culture? Do you know much about a "male dominant" society? Do you know what his faith is? Just how much do you know about this man?

Is your husband a citizen of the USA or here because he married a citizen?

Just why, as someone asked you and you never responded to, did YOU marry this man?

emma, he is NOT going to change. Live with it or move on.

And if you can, please refrain from using the Lord's name in vain, it is offensive to those of us who do believe in Jesus Christ. Substitute some other person to "appeal to" if you must.

That was of NO help to me at all....
and regarding taking the Lord's name in vain slap in the face...
You know what?? I believe in the lord...but, I often think he has forsaken me.
I got a little emotional! Get over yourself!
Thanks for the uplifting reply there....I didnt need that.

emm...you probably will not like my answer either.

I am a BS....I have successfully reconciled after divorce and recovered from a subsequent D-day that happened before my divorce.

When I did things without my wife and or my children it was not to engage in an A. I was selfish and did not listen to what my W needs were regarding companionship. This lead to HER PA and EA!!! I traveled for what is essentially a hobby. Do I still, without her, YES I do however not as much as I did. I cut it down 75%!!! We also talk....

And yes, my W sounded EXACTLY like you...convinced of my infidelity.....so...my advice, keep snooping...and try and relax....

emmawtrs - Have no concern, I will spend my time elsewhere. This will be my last post to you.

For what it is worth, I went back and read through every one of your threads before commenting or asking you questions.

I will leave it for others to draw their own conclusions about what they may or may not post to you or even if they want to play your "game." But yours has been a history, in my opinion, of one who has suspicions and unmet needs but absolutely no proof of infidelity. You married an Indian and appear to have no understanding of his culture or how it may have shaped him, and you apparantly have no desire to even explore that area.

When you said; "You know what?? I believe in the lord...but, I often think he has forsaken me,"
I hope you do truly believe in the Lord. But consider this, God does not forsake anyone who is truly born again. But human history is replete with many who have forsaken Him. That you are in, at best, an unevenly yoked marriage is NOT God's fault. Think about that and it may lead you to ways to improve your marriage and your choice of a marriage partner who does not appear to have Christ in his life.

For the record, emma, I "got over myself" a long time ago when I was faced with choosing for the Lord and submitting my life to Him or not. So I will do as it appears your husband has been doing, I will leave your "war" with windmills and self to yourself.

So I wish you well in your endeavors and truly hope that things work out for you. But I will respect your implied request and post nothing more to you.