My wife and I had gone through a stage for about 2 years where we did not have any sexual relationship at all. Fast forward to just the past few months, the sex picked up a little bit, however she has contracted genital herpes. She states her doctor told her it is from me kissing her while she had a "fever blister" in her mouth than performing orally on her vagina. I just find it really odd that this never occured in the past and all of a sudden pops up. Please tell me I am being paranoid, or if not, how do I handle this situation with her? I trust her and find it hard to believe she would ever cheat but how can I be certain? If I confront her I am afraid it will anger her and damage the relationship.

Hey NC
I caught yer post on another thread , looks like you really want some support !! 8)
Your doctor should have told you, but has not i guess.
It can go like that with herpes. Many scientific boring factors can go into why she did not get it before , and why she did now . Needless to say it is not unreasonable to go long periods of time getting "lucky" and not aquiring simplex 2 on the genitals. My suggestion is to not fret over it.Another suggestion is to just be very aware of your wifes behavior. Do not go overboard as that can harm the relationship. Just be open and pay attention. An affair will reveal itself if it is there. Also be positive,any negative behavior may take a great deal of time and effort to repair any behavior which can be overly obsessive or automatically incriminate her.
Good luck Peace out!

Gosh, I can't remember all the herpes stuff I've read, but I think that if the herpes came from a cold sore (HSV1), that in her genitals it would still show up as HSV1 and not HSVII. But I could be wrong. Hopefully some experts will show up.

Is all of her time accounted for? Do you have a keylogger on her computer?

Oh, and keep in mind that you are engaging in risky behavior. Did her doctor say that you need to be checked? Remember, you can contract herpes, even when she has no symptoms.

It was mentioned for me to just be aware that I may contract them (though I have not yet) and my wife has been very forthright (when she has a blister she will tell me so I do not come in contact, etc...) Her time is accounted for for the most part. She is a retail manager and spends a lot of time away from home, but nothing out of the ordinary. We have a child as well, she is an incredible mother and is with her all the time when not at work.

It is possible to contract genital herpes from oral-genital contact if the person has herpes I. I found a link on the web. The site also said that women are more likely to contract the virus then men.

CDC

I think believer is onto something. If I recall correctly, you can be tested for herpes, but I believe it has to be done during an outbreak. The test can tell you if it is HSVI or HSVII. If it is HSVI, then her story is likely true. If it is HSVII, well, it isn't from a coldsore. I'm not sure if this is acurate, but that is how I read it.

I hope you went or do go and discuss this with her doctor.
My daughter had lesions on her and was told she only had HVS1. Her male friends first test came back a neg, then a month later he was retested again and it was positive for HSV11. My daughter was retested again still no HSV11 was detected. Months lated a new boyfriend and he came down with HSV11. HSV11 is sexually transmitted and you can not protect yourself against it. Condoms DO NOT HELP as to blisters can be on the inner thighs, rectal area, ect. Towels must also be prevented from being shared. I think she is misunderstanding Herpe Simplex 1 with Simplex 2. Please read on Genital Herpes and cold sores. There is tons of info on the internet. There is also a better test that is done in the hospital that will detect if in deed it is the sexually transmitted disease HSV11.

bendover's rule #1: If your spouse is not having sex with you, then they are having sex with someone else. Time to have a serious talk with your wife.

Dr. Not really sure he ever stated his wife was not having sex with him. Sounds to me like it was quite a bit scary when
NC's wife contracted an STD .JUst a little clarification.
Also NC , really from what little I know, it just sounds like a bout of bad luck with your wife contracting herpes simplex on her genitals. Most of what you say adds up to your own sex life. She could have had a cold sore outbreak, and it "looked"
healed and over with but was in its final stages, the herpes then was passed from her to you , via lips, and then to her genitals.
I would just be very careful with each other in the future.
Be aware of outbreaks and use alternative forms of pleasure other than oral or genital contact during an outbreak. Also after being frisky ,cleaning up really well is probably a good idea.Just to be certain the little herpes critters don't get passed from still being on any of your body parts.
Just FYI , my wife and I both get cold sores, herpes simplex I, and practice these safe habits, so far we have had no bad luck in getting genital herpes.
So being safe can be a really good idea for not spreading it. Herpes can be gotten on or in any area that generally holds moisture.IE: Eyes,nose, throat,genitals.
SO now it just looks like lifestyle adjustments for you and misses NC. I would really recommend not letting the thought of affair get in the way of loving each other.

Your wife could very well have been cheating on you (but there is only one way to know for sure). There is a chance that she is not but there are some red flags in your post.

Why did you not have sex for 2 years? Many spouses will go 2 years without if they are getting it somewhere else so I guess I would want to know what was happening?

It is just as possible that she caught something and started having sex with you to cover it if you went 2 years without. The only sure fire way to tell is to go get a lie-detector test. If it isn't that big of a deal to you then skip that idea but it is the only way to know for sure.

But again, in a marriage going 2 years without sex and not having either spouse cheat seems a little off to me. Spouses that cheat will sometimes cut off sex with their spouse so I would want to hear why you were no longer having sex for such a long time? A lot of red flags here??