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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 322
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Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 322
Hi to all the Wonderful MB folks here,

OK..just kinda checking in and reading what some of you are writing. I am telling anyone who contacts me BTW exactly where I am in this long drawn out separation process.

Believe me my STBXH couldn't be more gone. He is with OW day and night and her kids. I'm over him.

I met someone...a guy...I wrote about him before...now I think he just might be into the physical aspect of things. So he doesn't give me much to hold onto...but the physical/affection does feel so good...when you haven't been treated well in years. I like this guy A LOT. Mom says I'm coming on to strong. I want and need more though.

I still talk to guys and sometimes I'll meet one just because this other guy doesn't seem serious. ugh. I know I should be so comfortable and happy being alone but I want companionship. Laughing...holding hands.

Well...you know building yourself up so much is great...but once you've got it all...then what...you still want to fall in love. Sometimes I just long..have a heartache...talk about vunerable...perhaps this guy was a wolf.

I still can't figure him out. It is like he doesn't want to be either.

I'm just going to say it but don't us women NEED SF too!!! What is soooo wrong with that? This single life is killing me. Talk about issues...I need to get out of here and meet some men.

I know this doesn't sound very lady like...tsk, tsk. On this site too...I believe in marraige builders and gave it my all...now I want a love.

Ok..some guy did fall for me...like a lost puppy...why is it the ones that are so needy turn you off...it is probably why I'm turning this guy off. But it is difficult when your lusting and trying to keep things sensible...it doesn't really go together very well.

Enough rambling for now.

Be Well...everyone...

Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,774
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Posts: 2,774
ok, first of all, never say "tsk tsk" lol
of course women need sex too!
however, just be careful.
sex without a relationship can really mess with your head.

after my ex and i split up, it had been over 2 years since i had sf. 2 years my ex and i had none. of course he was getting it elsewhere but that is another story. so, i had a close friend ( we are still friends, but not as close as we used to be) and we kind of thought maybe we could just fill that sf need for eachother. no relationship, just friendship and sex. well, first off i should never have listened to the ideas of a man 11 years younger than me. no no no. and secondly, the sex just messed with my head. it only happened twice and i could not allow it anymore. i love sex, but i love it with someone i love. if we are only friends and nothing else, i cannot connect with someone sexually. it was plain and simply "just sex". it was not satisfying, nothing.
took me a little while to recover from that quite honestly.

but i understand the wanting the companionship, the hand holding, all of that. i totally get that. i am not a casual kind of person, i am a relationship kind of person.

you will find that, and it is ok to want sex! just want it under the right conditions. i fear this guy and that you are going to get really hurt. be careful.

mlhb


God first, family second, and all else will fall into place.

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 322
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Posts: 322
Hi mlhb!

Thank you for your response...btw I'm in WNY and it's all ice here too...and I'm a NATURAL blonde as well. Lots in common there.

I think your right about this guy. It is killing me...I would like there to be more "relationship" going on here...but there is almost nothing there. When I'm with him he touches so softly and looks at me with these intense eyes...drives me CRAZY!!!! And he behaves like we have a relationship....I want more though. I'm fooling myself and I should just back off now and fast.

I'm just so sad, I guess my excitement, infatuation...all that just gives me those rose colored glasses. Everybody talks about that love and first...it is such a good feeling. Anyway..if this guy had wanted to take the relationship up a notch I'd be right there...I like him a lot.

Just got to cut it off.

I've been on match.com, chemistry...a lot of weird guys but a few nice ones. I've met a few now for tea/coffee...no sparks. They're all quite a bit older than me so far. I kinda have it in my head I want a guy who is mature, mature...you know? Not some guy who is still finding himself.

brother

Joined: Jun 2005
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i get it. my ex was 4 years younger than me and boy did it make a difference! the man i am dating now is one your older and it is wonderful to be on the same page!!!

mlhb


God first, family second, and all else will fall into place.

Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 464
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Posts: 464
Quote
I'm just going to say it but don't us women NEED SF too!!! What is soooo wrong with that? This single life is killing me. Talk about issues...I need to get out of here and meet some men.

LWP, judging from the women I have met, most of whom are 15 to 20 years older than you, you are perfectly normal in wanting SF. If I was rich, famous or very good looking, maybe I could understand the demands for SF better. But, I am only a remarkably unremarkable middle aged, guy! So, it has to be in the nature of you women.


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