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Joined: Jan 2007
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Post deleted by lonelyolive
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 51
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Post deleted by lonelyolive
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Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 4,222
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Does that sound like a good plan or crazy? It's a good plan, you are getting the hang of this. It is admiration that your WH craves. Keep feeding it to him, and with all the drama with the OW he'll choose to get it from you.
Jim BS - 32 (me) FWW - 33 Married 8/31/03 No kids (but 3 cats) D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA) NC agreed to - 11/8/06 NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07 Status - In Recovery Jim's Story
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 51
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Post deleted by lonelyolive
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Joined: Nov 2006
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NC is the only thing that will get him out of his rut. Keep pushing (gently) for it. He is think about you when he is having SF with you, but part of him feels guilty for "cheating" on OW. He'll get over it when there is NC and he gets through a month or two of withdrawal. In the meantime, keep him busy. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Once he gets through withdrawal, then is the time to get him into counseling.
Jim BS - 32 (me) FWW - 33 Married 8/31/03 No kids (but 3 cats) D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA) NC agreed to - 11/8/06 NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07 Status - In Recovery Jim's Story
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 51
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Joined: Jan 2007
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Post deleted by lonelyolive
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Joined: Nov 2006
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What you are doing is good, your WH is just ADDICTED to OW and it will be a struggle to keep him from getting his fix. I would talk to MC and see if he/she is familiar with Dr. Harley's principles. I would push for NC in counseling, preferably in writing, but do not let him break it off in person (we all know how that went last time). Keep using positive reinforcement with your WH like, "I know you didn't mean for it happen, I forgive you, let's just get her out of our lives and move on." Let him know you WANT him. Once you've gotten to the point where he is over her, then you need to get to counseling to work out your problems that led to the A. Now is not the time to argue over problems at MC.
Jim BS - 32 (me) FWW - 33 Married 8/31/03 No kids (but 3 cats) D-Days - 8/25/06 (EA), 11/3/06 (PA) NC agreed to - 11/8/06 NC broken - 11/28/06, 12/16/06, 1/18/07, 1/26/07, 1/27/07 Status - In Recovery Jim's Story
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