Where do I begin? I have been chekcing out all the info on plan A, but still can't even contemplate where to start. I guess I have been through this so many times and feel like I have always handled it the wrong way, I am aprehensive to even begin.
I have found info, emails, texts, pictures, that my husband currently has at least TWO different OW contacting him. He travels for work and opportunities are easy. It has been about 6 months since I discovered the last affair with another OW. The fun never ends. (she says with a heavy note of sarcasm.)
It is difficult to take my M seriously anymore, I feel like it has become sort of twisted comedy.
I was never jelous, I had complete trust in my husband. Big mistake. He continues to be a wonderful loving man, he is considerate, sweet and loving to me when we are together. We have dates every week and spend tons of family time together with the kids when he is home, but he leads this double life and acts like everything is completely normal? I am so confused at this point. We have had counseling, together and he has gone individually.
The M returns to a loving trusting entitiy and then, WHAM we are right back at him starting another affair. I think he is addicted to that feeling of infatuation. The butterflies you get when another person, who barely knows you and all your baggage, adores you and everything you do.
That electricity. We still have a wonderful love life, but I know after 17 years, the spark is not there every time, it is most of the time, just not every time.
Do I throw in the towel? Each time he refuses to think about divorce. I guess he wants to have his cake and eat it too, which I have indulged him in for the past 8 years.
I don't want to divorce either, I don't want it for me or my children. So, do I accept that I am doomed to repeat this senario, to stay with the man I love and keep my family together? I know I have to find this answer for myself, but it is always nice to hear what someone else thinks.
thanks to all, it helps to get this all out.

My husband admitted to me he was having an affair in November. I have had a difficult time ...as most of us do. The best thing I did was buy the book How to Survive an Affair..I just got it Sunday and I wish I had read it months ago. I had read His Needs Her Needs..in fact my H and I read it together but it did not sound "like us." How To Survive An Affair is us almost to a T. Great practical advise...it details step A/B and give you and your spouse support. I am going to start rereading it with my husband tonite.

Repost this tread as soon as possible at the General Questions II forum. There will be some very frank input coming soon after from the real experts here.

Repost at GQII.

Sorry that you're here, but you're in the right place.

How old are you guys and how old are your kids? Was there any past infidelity on either part prior to what you've mentioned so far?

Is he at least using protection when he's doing these OW's? If not, he could get one of them knocked up, or give you something as a souveneir of his trip, if you take my meaning.

You've let him get away with this for 8 years? No wonder he's still doing it. He has no reason to change his behavior. It's time to put a stop to it.

How solid is your evidence? Can you expose to his employer? If he is doing this on business trips, his employer might not be thrilled.

Do you have information on these OW's? Are they married? A call to OWH would be in order - it will make it tough for your WH to continue with that particular OW, and OWH deserves to know anyway. Whether they're married or not, a direct call from you to OW might put a crimp in his style.

Does WH have any family that you could expose to? Anyone that he looks up to and would listen to when they told him he was being a selfish a$$?

Get yourself a copy of Surviving an Affair. Read up on Plan A, and keep in mind that it is not Plan Doormat. While you're doing plan A, you're busting up his affair(s). There is an article on the carrot and stick of plan A; read it. The idea is to get him to CHOOSE you and the marriage - not as the default choice, but as the better choice.

Good luck and keep posting!