At the beginning of our relationship i had a drug problem. I told him one day that i wouldn't do drugs anymore, but i continued. After the initial loss of trust he would "find" things and accuse me of things that had actually never happened. Eventually we somewhat worked this all out, although the trust was obviously not as it once had been. A little while ago he said that i don't act like i love him anymore (holding hands, sex, ect.) but I feel like i get on his nerves with my affection sometimes. We work opposite schedules so it is extremely rare that we get a day off together. Tonight he said that he would rather me not be out driving because the roads were bad and he was worried, so i told him that i would stay in. i waited around for a time but then i left. i knew i needed to call him..but for some stupid reason i didn't. He feels like i lied to him and i guess i did. He says that he's tried and tried to keep this relationship together but he won't anymore. Is there anything i can do? i love him more than anything in this world.

i should also mention that after i said i'd quit doing drug i almost overdosed...or rather i did, twice, and he basically kept me from dying.

C's edits This is either the way he sees it, or more like the truth

At the beginning of our relationship i had a drug problem. I told him one day that i wouldn't do drugs anymore, but i continued. After the initial loss of trust he would "find" things and accuse me of things that had actually never happened. I would also lie to him and say that I wasn't doing them, to admit later that I actually was. Eventually we somewhat worked this all out (He wiped the slate at the new year/ christmas, although the trust was obviously not as it once had been. A little while ago he said that i don't act like i love him anymore (lieing, not taking care of myself, ect.) but I feel like i get on his nerves with my affection sometimes (usually only when i know that he is upset with me because of the lies). We work opposite schedules (even though we found 2 solutions to resolve this, I decided to wait) so it is extremely rare that we get a day off together, however, what little time we do have together(approx 23 hours a week), i find it more convinient to slip off and go shopping or do the other things in the few hours he asked for each day.

Tonight he said that it would be stupid to confront someone with a past history of fatal violence, given icey/rainy weather conditions,, so i told him that i would stay in. i waited around for a time (35-55 minutes) in which time i showered and called a friend, but then i left. i knew i needed to call him to fulfil my obligation of trust ..but for some stupid reason i didn't. He feels like i lied to him and i guess i did. He says that he's tried and tried, and I agree, to keep this relationship together but he won't anymore. Is there anything i can do to keep my old lifestyle and him both? i love him more than anything in this world as long as its convenient.

How's your drug addiction? I believe the best way to start regaining his trust is to seek help/ treatment and quit drugs.

After that, just follow the MB principals. Read the site with him.

Policy of Radical Honesty, His need Her needs.

It's all in your hands. I think you are at a point where you have to chose between your addiction and your H.
You cant save your marriage and continue on drugs.

Trust will take time but can come back.

How long are you married?
How old are you? Do you have kids?

Be srtong. Wish you the best

I am absolutely DONE with drugs. Drugs, for me, are no longer an issue. My friends know this, i know this, he doesn't believe me. He has good reason not to, yes, but when i feel like it's not even a problem because i've not done anything and he thinks im high, how do i get him to believe me?

we've been together going on 2 years, im 20, and no kids yet.

Its purely a trust issue. With some when that is violated it's devastating. (me being one of them) I wish I could tell you how to get it back, but it's ultimately their decision whether to let you have it back. I wish I could tell you more..it would help me learn to trust again. I know my issues come from my past. I never learned how to "re-trust", I figured if you violated it, then you hurt me once. If I don't give it back you can't hurt me again. I would be on top of the world if I could only figure out how to trust again.

I wish you well in your search. I know it's a decision I have to make, just don't want to hurt anymore...so i dont make the decision. Maybe your guy is like that also. Doesn't hurt to ask.