My WH is being completely selfish when it comes to this D. Because I've been in Plan B (for my own sanity), the only updates I receive are through my attorney. Unfortunately, this D is moving forward. We're stuck in the negotiations process which is creating a lot of anger inside of me. First of all, WH never bothered on working on this M. It was all a facade. While we were in MC and meeting with our pastor on "fixing our M", WH was deep in the A. What angers me most is that WH betrayed me. He made all the decisions in ending this M and now he's dragging his feet with parting with his money. He's not showing an ounce of sympathy by leaving me in the dust. The sin has taken over his life and unfortunately, he isn't showing any signs of remorse.

My attorney just updated me on WH's reluctance to settle with the amount that I'm asking for. WH has been the biggest jerk to me since d-day and he hasn't changed a bit. I'm angry at all the grief he's put me through. I'm angry that I have to start my life all over again. I'm angry that he did not honor his marital commitment. I'm angry that he left the church and is actively disobeying God. I'm angry that his sin has taken our marriage. I'm angry that he hasn't shown any signs of regret or remorse. I'm angry that he used to say "Divorce isn't the answer, marriage is for life." I'm angry that he is worshiping at another church with the OW. Most of all, I'm angry that I no longer have the man I fell in love with who pledged his life to me. That man is gone.

With all this anger, I want so much to call WH and vent. I want to tell him everything that has happened since he left. I want to tell him that he has hurt me to the core. I also want to tell him that through all this pain and hurt, I haven't jumped into the arms of another man. Instead, I have worked on myself, found quality friends and continued to be involved in the church. I just want him to know that I haven't forgotten about him but perhaps I've become a better woman since he left me for OW.

How do I deal with all this anger brewing inside of me?

(((((ready to wait)))))

Firat of all, you need to realize that your anger is no hurting your WH nor is it making hime see the pain his betrayal is causing. Your anger is damaging you!

If a house is burning, you don't go running looking for the arson... you put out the fire.

You first need to take care of yourself. Find comfort and peace.

Don't confront your WH in anger. A WS does not care one bit about the pain and anger of a BS, so don't seek comfort there.

Do you have a spiritual life?
do you pray or meditate?
Do you exercise in the fresh air?
Are you creative?

These types of things can help. focus on getting your soul back to a safe and peaceful place.

Breathe and smile, breathe and simle.

Anger = drinking a rat poison and waiting/wishing the rat would notice you drink it and the rat die from it.

-rh-

redhat,
now that is so true. I needed that!