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Marriage Builders Forums Our Archives Archived Read-Only Posts Inactive: General Questions Friends not supporting MB concepts

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Friends not supporting MB concepts #1825928 02/14/07 12:18 PM
Joined: Jan 2007 Posts: 374 Alabama D Dupree OP Member
OP Dupree Member D Joined: Jan 2007 Posts: 374 Alabama	Hi all- I'm having trouble with my friends supporting Plan A. They mean well but want me to stop being nice to my WH. Think I should dump him after all he's done etc. He's walking all over me, can do whatever he wants etc. I'm finding it hard to take the criticism. They think I'm being weak. I had an appt with Steve at MB and he told me to continue Plan A guarded. I'm curious though, everytime I seem to pull away from my WH he seems to be drawn to me more than when I'm nice. Any comments?

Re: Friends not supporting MB concepts Dupree #1825929 02/14/07 01:29 PM
Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 46 S Soonerorlatter Member
Soonerorlatter Member S Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 46	I keep trying to respond but it isn't working so this is a test..... _____________ FBS - 2001 or so

Re: Friends not supporting MB concepts Soonerorlatter #1825930 02/14/07 01:43 PM
Joined: Jun 2004 Posts: 8,344 D Dealan-de Member
Dealan-de Member D Joined: Jun 2004 Posts: 8,344	Soonerorlater...try writing it down as a draft in email, then copy/paste. MB times out after awhile for some reason...but if you lose a post that way, simply hit the back key, copy what you've written, refresh the page, then paste...that usually will work! Ani, I understand. I found it MUCH easier to talk here about plan A...AND if I did share info with IRL friends, I made certain to send them the links to MB so they could inform themselves before they made comments to me. If they continued to be unsupportive/not understanding, I tactfully told them that this was MY life and MY plan. Your friends more than likely love you and do not understand the full meaning and goals of the plans. - Kimmy I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution? O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!

Re: Friends not supporting MB concepts Dealan-de #1825931 02/15/07 11:17 AM
Joined: May 2006 Posts: 1,300 R rltraveled Member
rltraveled Member R Joined: May 2006 Posts: 1,300	Ani, Look at it this way--doing Plan A "feels" counterintuitive. When I was doing it, to the best of my ability, and for a good six months, I felt like the biggest idiot on the planet. Most friends and family members kept their mouths shut; some came right out and told me I was crazy, that they would NEVER put up with such utter nonsense. One told me I had no self-esteem. I resorted to simply not discussing it with them. I didn't get angry. I could understand how it must have seemed to them. But, I kept telling myself that they weren't in my position. They hadn't done all the research. They simply didn't know. Plan A, a very short Plan B -- and my husband came around. Let them say/think what they want. Until they walk in your shoes, don't let them judge you.

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