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As stated there are no grounds for a restraining order. It's sad... but it's true. A restraining order is a restriction of rights... and nothing happened here that would warrant that.

Here's what you should do. Send him a cerified letter telling him that you do not wish to hear from him for things other than parenting issues. Also, let him know that any contact with you outside of the hours of 9am-9pm except in cases of emergencies involving the children, will be considered harassment.

Right now though... you have no grounds for an order.


thanks for this

... please educate me (and others)

What ARE grounds for a RO?

Pep

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If you are a wayward spouse in the fog the answer is easy:

JUST ABOUT ANYTHING YOU CAN MAKE UP WITH THE HELP OF A RESOURCEFUL AND GREEDY LAWYER

Which is a big reason that BS's (particularly BH's that are behind the eight ball when it comes to winning custody in the first place) need to protect themselves. NOTHING says "father gets custody" like a tape recording of your WW threatening you with a bogus restraining order as proof that the police report she is about to file is a complete lie. Filing of bogus claims is a serious offense and no judge will trust such WS with the "best interests of the children" when a WS gets busted misreprenting their spouse and co-parent of their children. Only works IF you can document it.

Mr. Wondering


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
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In most jurisdictions, I believe the requirememnts would be similar.

Types Of Restraining Orders: There are two types of personal conduct restraining orders: Civil Harassment and Domestic Violence . The requirements to obtain a domestic violence restraining order are as follows:

There must be a Domestic Relationship between you and the person to be restrained.
Presently or previous married to each other
Presently or previously dating each other-presently or previously engaged to each other
Presently or previously living together in an intimate relationship (if solely roommates, the proper restraining order is a civil harassment restraining order)
Have a child or children in common with each other
Are related to each other by blood within the second degree (i.e., parent, sibling, grandparent)
Are related by marriage (i.e., mother-in-law, brother-in-law)
If the relationship between you and the person to be restrained is not a domestic relationship, the appropriate type of retraining order is a civil harassment restraining order.

There must be recent physical violence (generally within the past 30 days) OR a threat of imminent physical violence before the court will issue a temporary restraining order (TRO). In other words, has the person to be restrained committed at least one of the following:

Physically assaulted or attempted to physically assault you or a member of your household (including sexual assault)
Caused, threatened, or attempted bodily injury to you or a member of your household
Made you or a member of your household afraid of bodily harm
Temporary restraining orders may also be issued if there is a significant history of stalking.

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okay
noted!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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anything else?

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I went to try to get a restraining order when my WH was in the process of moving back into the house. It was quick - I just filled out papers and went immediately before the judge.

However, there was no threat, no history of violence, and the only thing I put down was that WH was stealing everything that wasn't nailed down, and having his OW over to our home.

The judge denied it, and told me I had no grounds, UNLESS I WANTED TO REDO THE PAPERWORK!!!! I was amazed. It was like he was suggesting that I lie. It made me lose some faith in the justice system in California.

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WH was stealing everything that wasn't nailed down


Believer, you did not need a RO ... you needed a hammer and a bunch of nails !

Pep

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There must be recent physical violence (generally within the past 30 days) OR a threat of imminent physical violence before the court will issue a temporary restraining order (TRO). In other words, has the person to be restrained committed at least one of the following:

Physically assaulted or attempted to physically assault you or a member of your household (including sexual assault)
Caused, threatened, or attempted bodily injury to you or a member of your household
[color:"red"]Made you or a member of your household afraid of bodily harm [/color]
Temporary restraining orders may also be issued if there is a significant history of stalking.

[color:"red"] Mr Wondering ... is THIS the one that will most likely get the BH in trouble? [/color]

Pep

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LOL. The funny thing is, it worked anyway. I came home and told WH I went to court, waved the papers (that said DENIED) and told him he needed to move his stuff out, and he did. Didn't even ask to see the papers.

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[color:"red"] Temporary restraining orders may also be issued if there is a significant history of stalking.
[/color]

is making unwanted early AM phone calls considered to be significant stalking?

Pep

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LOL. The funny thing is, it worked anyway. I came home and told WH I went to court, waved the papers (that said DENIED) and told him he needed to move his stuff out, and he did. Didn't even ask to see the papers.

[color:"blue"] I remember this! What a foggy dummy ! LOL[/color] <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

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no... not unless they happen frequently or are accpmanied by other things.

did she ever tell him not to call at 2 am?

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LMAO @ believer!

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I really appreciate your patience MEDC

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no... not unless they happen frequently or are accpmanied by other things.

like what "other things" ?

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did she ever tell him not to call at 2 am?

would this have to be in writing?

Pep

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other types of harassment. It needs to be with a frequency and severity to warrant a restriction on a persons rights. So, showing up at her house three nights a week... calling twenty times a day... showing up at work..you know... stalker behavior!
It's hard to prove something not in writing. Keep good records of calls and stop bys. Send certified letters and DO NOT inititiate any informal contact... this can throw the whole process down the tubes.
It's sometimes just easier to "fudge" a bit and say you were threatened. The process is too cumbersome...but sadly, WS and women frequently use the lie tactic to their unfair advantage.... the system just sucks.

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I'm willing to bet Believer is, or would be a he// of a poker player. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />


BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04

***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***

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