A few weeks ago I was playing with my husbands phone and found a message between he and the OW. I confronted him and much to my dismay, he admitted EVERYTHING! It happened 7 months ago and only lasted about 6 weeks. I never knew! He never changed toward me (we were even intimate during the affair)
Thing is...I know the OW, where she works and where she lives. I am so angered by the very thought of her that ther are times that I am prepared to be arrested for busting her [censored]! I have 3 children and they are the only reason I havn't confronted the OW -if I do- I know the police will have to get involved.
Just when I was starting to loose some of the anger -she had her current boyfriend call me to try and convince me that she was very sorry about what happened.I swear the entire room went RED!
I HATE HER SO MUCH!
I found this site as soon as my husband decided that he wanted to work things out, and it has been the only thing to pull me through. I printed and read everything on the site -still I find that the burning ANGER has not subsided.
Will it ever go away?

Yes - it is very new and raw to you at this point. It will take at least 2 years to get over this.

Ticked,

Although it is easier to vent your anger and frustration off on the OW, your H should be the focus. My EXWW did her thing two years ago and I still have moments of anger over the A. Now though instead of putting it all off on the OM I am able to see that he was just one of many choices the EX could have made. Since then many, many other lies and half truths have been revealed and she has shown her lack of character.

All of this is about their choices in life, not yours. Your H has revealed a flaw in his character for you in detail. What you have to decide is if this flaw is something that will continue to be a problem for the both of you or if it is just a symptom of a deterioriated relationship between the two of you. MB principles help when it is the later.

An IC will help in dealing with the anger and you should try and see one with your H. He needs to hear about the pain and hurt you are feeling so that he too can help this go away faster. Be thankful he has made the decision to try and work things out. Some of us never had such an opportunity no matter how hard we tried and worked at it.

I'm struggling with almost the same issue. I don't like how much hatred has built up inside me for the OM. It's a good thing he lives over 1,000 miles away! (she met him online). I literally imagine myself all the time wrapping my hands around his neck and snuffing the life out of him.

It boils my blood thinking how much this guy fell for my wife, and he's still not over her, constantly emails her, who knows if he still tries calling her, all while knowing that she's MARRIED WITH CHILDREN! I think people like him are the scum of the earth, knowingly destroying families and forever damaging the lives of innocent little children.

I may eventually seek IC for this, as I really don't like myself for this hatred I'm harboring.