Have been struggling for quite a while. I have been refraining from LB's and listening to her needs. It always seems she will look for anything to point to and say "see your not trying". What she points to is normaly a twist of something or just down right fabricated. There seems to be a double standard too. How I am to act or be, (which is not out of the question), and how she can do what she wants or change the rules.

Any way today is our 15th anniversary. Also the day our D is undergoing Case managment. (Setting up the timeline for Aprasals, Discovery's, and interagatory due dates).

I have tried not to beg her to reconsider. But have stated that this is her choice to D and I do not believe in it. I am responsible for some of the problems in our marriage and am trying to bring our M to a new place. She still say's the D is mine, I want it. I can not believe it. She hasn't said I love you in over a year and now where we are.

Should I try to go dark now? It will be hard as we still live together and do things with the kids.

I have felt there could be an A going on but have been unable to catch it. Things seem a little fishy now and things are telling me I may have an Idea. It might just be an EA it might be a tough one to crack or prove. I don't think there is e-mail going back and forth. I haven't put a key logger because I am almost sure she will find it. Cell shows no long calls and I don't know his cell number.

As you know, you are in deep trouble, your family, your children...
May I ask?:

Do you understand read His Needs Her Needs? Did you read it?

Did you call Steve Harley or Jennifer Chalmers?

Did you cal Dr Bill Harley on his radio show?

Does your MC have a plan to restore Love between you?

Did you both do the Emotional Needs Questionnaire? Do you understand what she needs from you to be in love with you?

Did you get and read Surviving An Affaire?

Did your wife identify her most important Emotional Needs for you to fill? She is in deep emotional divorce, she probably will not want you to but what did she say? Do you know about Affection and Intimate conversation?

Are you in shape? Taking antidepressants?

What does her friends and family say? Did you ask for their help?

You should never be apart over night… You should go on any vacation, visit away from home.


DLK21

"Please remember: With the exception of the Marriage Builders® Weekend Private forums, the advice offered on these forums is offered by your peers - it is NOT professional advice and should not be taken as such. If you want professional advice, please look at information about the MB Counseling Center, or seek a professional counselor.
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