you said
for the record....

"done much good" - you were very instrumental in helping me get to a place where i was able to confess. i was and remain grateful to you for that.

as for helping me personally recover. you have given me very good areas to ponder, and that has helped some but since i do not seem to be extremely far in the path of total recovery, i can see where that does not seem like you have done any good.

"done anything to harm" you once told me you would say a prayer for DH the way you did for Mrs. Pure. It hurt that you never followed up on that.

your decision to pretty much give up on me, which was and is clear to me, does not really hurt so much but it is disheartening. in reality that is more your thing than mine.

i just wanted you to know all that.

thanks
I'm glad you wrote this

Pep

well, pep... you are welcome.

does it make any difference to anything?

bump ^ not sure if you saw my last question to you.

Thanks for the bump.

The question is

Does it make any difference to anything?

I realize that sometimes I can help without knowing it.
Probably goes the other way too.
I can harm without knowing it.

I am practicing letting go of certain things. My Al-Anon tendencies sneak back in and sometimes I catch myself repeating old behaviors/patterns/out-of-date coping.

So I am practicing letting go and letting God. This is my struggle against my nature. And, I suppose, I will always struggle with this to some degree. And, that's OK <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> ... I am letting go of my guilt/anxiety/worry that I have too much guilt/anxiety/worry.

Some of my favorite patients are cancer survivors, because they live with such gusto! They have learned to thrive under dire circumstances. I watch and observe what works .. and try to emulate.

Pep

cool