eav,


This is the only thing I have ever worried about with you...not whether you wait, move on, whatever...I support you whatever your choice.

BUT...I would be thrilled to see you content...even if he never comes home. I have found that contentment in my relationship with God. HE is my husband now...until such time as mine returns or a new one is brought to me (NO HUNTING ON MY END!). I am totally and completely satisfied and it has nothing to do with my circumstances. That is what I want for you!!!!!

You deserve it...you are a woman of great character. I am so glad you stand by your convictions...even when pushed by others to give up.

mimi, I am 100% sure that this info is correct. The man who told me is a very honest, caring man. He personally saw the "make out" session and personally confronted my H with the info. WH at first tried to deny, then admitted he needed to "take care of it" The man promised my H he would not say anything to me.

When WH left on d-day, this man went to my Pastor and his wife (my good friend and boss) and told him about this incident. All 3 decided that "the waters were muddy enough already" and that this new info would not help me in coming to a clear decision.

AFTER I made my decision (which I posted here) to be done with my plan B, the gentleman approached me, with tear filled eyes, and told me the story. To me, at the time, it was confirmation that what I had been feeling in my heart (that is was ok for me to let go and move forward). I still feel very much that way.

In all honesty, I am looking back at that time and see some of the same signs that were present during this A.

In addition, there was a time about 7 or 8 years ago, that my H admitted to me (after a very amazing church service) that he had planned on having an A. He told me he had stopped wearing his wedding band, chose the woman that he was going to have the A with and was actively pusuing her. He admitted this to me as if he had not done it. I now think that he may have already done it. If not the thought life and pattern were there.

In addition again...there were at least 4 times in my M that I know of a specific women (4 different ones) that he was "chasing" after. He was overly friendly with these women, was definitely flirting, overly touchy and "huggy".

I knew in my heart all those times and asked him to back off, but he always made me feel like I was over reacting.

Anyway, that is why the other thread caught my eye.

I am not adding to my "history" or rewriting it , and I am finally not "sugar coating" it.

One more thing...

When my WH and I talked for the first time after he left in July, I asked him how many women there had been and he said "I don't want to talk about that right now"

He didn't deny, he just pushed off the conversation. He does not like confrontation.

IHC, get over to EAV's THREAD please...

silent...how do you think eav is doing...has she called you ar indicated that she would?

Can I just admit that it feels good to be free?

I FEEL so light now.

I know that I am at the right place, in the right time.

I am somewhat nervous about what the future holds...will there be someone for me, but I am so content.

My 13th anniversary is coming up...I am wondering how that will hit me.

Reading on chris' thread about children being a reason to celebrate made me appreciate my M for what it was and what it brought me.

Now I hope to be among those who can be a better wife the next time around. I believe I have grown enough to be that person.

Now it is about finishing up the healing so that I no longer carry any "baggage" into the future.

sl, how did you get crowned as a graduate of plan B? I saw that and feel like I missed something. help me out!?!

It is good to hear you right now IHC, you sound confident, and happy. That is EXACTLY where I am right now...

AND, you did miss alot..here's the thread Mimi started for me

Silentlucidity you can't keep this secret

Yeah...I just saw it this morning... I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />