Post deleted by britheblondie

Well, it's definitely not WRONG to apologize for hurting a person, even if you don't understand what hurt them. That isn't a sin.

And to give him the benefit of the doubt, we haven't heard his side of the story, so it's a little hard to give you advice that would help both of you. And not to say you're like this, but have you maybe considered if you aren't sensitive enough? If you guys are opposites with sensitivity, then try to learn from your spouse to be more sensitive, and hopefully he can learn from you to not be so "overly-sensitive." Work together on that.

Assuming your husband doesn't have like some severe emotional disorder, that causes compulsive desires to get apologies and pity parties, then he very well might have a legitimate reason for telling you that something hurt him. Be careful before saying "he gets hurt over nothing." Not saying you're wrong, just be careful.

And I don't really know what advice to give you other than do everything you can to make peace. That's very biblical. And don't just say sorry to "make him happy." That's shallow. Say sorry because you care about his feelings, and want to show him that. He'll respect you for that. It's not a bad thing to do that, even if you don't think you did anything wrong. I'm sure you'd appreciate if he did the same for you if the roles were reversed.

How is that a bad thing, ya know?

Here is a link to a great article by Steven Harley, on this Marriage Builders website, that addresses this issue:

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8507_fft.html

The message seems to be that yes, you should apologize if you hurt your spouse, even if you don't think what you did should have hurt. This is a great article, which should give you a reasonably complete answer to your question, from the Marriage Builders perspective.

You might also look at the idea that your deciding that your husband is oversensitive is actually a Love Buster - Disrespectful Judgements. Check this link for why I say this:

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3402_disrespect.html

Of course, it is also a Disrespectful Judgement, and probably an Angry Outburst, too, when he reacts the way he does. HOWEVER, that is not for you to worry about - your job is ONLY to work on yourself, not on your husband. It would be disrespectful for you to even assume that your perspective on what he needs to work on is superior to his perspective.

I hope this is helpful to you.