Hello All,

It has been a while since I have posted and the last couple of months have been hellish.

Finally have true NC between my wife and the OM, the last contact was in person on the 23rd of Feb and via e-mail on the 26th of Feb. So I guess the affair went from the end of OCT to the end of Feb in some form. Instead of a true relief, which is what I expected, I just feel so drained.

My FWW finally couldn't take the OM messing with her head any more (this realization came in a very scary situation for both me and my wife) and made the decision to withdraw from the university until the OM was no longer there, a semester from now. She said she needed to work on herself and our marriage.

My nervousness and constant worry that she was going to bump into him on campus has finally gone away and I can focus again at work.

Our wedding anniversary is coming up and I am not sure how to handle it. Our fist wedding anniversary was great, a romantic getaway at a B&B. Now so much has changed, I still love my wife with all of my heart, but how do you handle this when everything is still so raw?

I have trouble finding the energy to smile at times, let alone plan our second anniversary.

Sometimes, even though we are doing so much better than we were a month ago, two and three months ago, our relationship seems forced. Not to mention that both she and I have been on AD with noticeable sexual side effects. (I guess I should be thankful that it is actually an issue) There seems like so much pressure. (I am whining now)

How do I go about this?

Thanks for your ears...

-J

Go finish reading (or re-reading) HN/HN.

Then call Jennifer C @ MB for a recovery plan.

L.

Jason,

It's good to hear from you, especially under these circumstances. All I can say is that it gets better with time. Just have fun right now and enjoy each other's company. The constant worrying will go away the further you are away from last contact. See if she will change her number or block his email or whatever it will take to make you feel safer. It WILL get better, it just takes some time. After you feel like things are getting better you need to go to some MC and sort out how and why this happened and what needs to be done in the future to protect your M from this happening again. I wish you the best. Try and enjoy your anniversary.